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Dave Bowman
(2,985 posts)![](/emoticons/evilgrin.gif)
CincyDem
(6,814 posts)One little love seat and they call me couch-fcker for life.
speak easy
(10,124 posts)but only once. Cross my heart and
jmbar2
(5,813 posts)Hugin
(34,209 posts)The smell of burnt coffee and stale doughnuts hanging in the air. In a circle of purposely uncomfortable folding chairs a group of nervous participants sit facing each other in rumpled and unkempt clothing. Their palms wet with sweat.
A new member of the group speaks for the first time, Hello, my name is * mumble * and I am a supellectilem amans. The rest of the group replies in unison with, Welcome, whatever-the-hell-you-said-your-name-is.
The new member rubs his hands together and haltingly begins to tell his story of how he fell to be among those present, It all started off so innocently. I was only sitting there to rest, but the couch did it. Taunts with flowered velour and Naugahyde trim. After the first time it was easier and easier. I was caught in its grip. Soon it was no longer enough! I was spending thousands of dollars on high end orthopedic seats and lounges. There were dozens of settings for massages and vibration from all around the world. I neglected everything else. My job and family until eventually I lost it all. IT RUINED MY LIFE! I was sneaking into retirement homes hoping to find an unattended therapy seat. When I could scrounge a few bucks I would check into a hourly rate motel with a hand full of quarters to forget, if just for a little while in the embrace of a vibrating mattress
As the speaker continues tears of understanding can be seen in the eyes of the other silent members of the group.
speak easy
(10,124 posts)The oldest excuse in the furniture section.
Wicked Blue
(6,434 posts)![](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2024/07/25/18/87770011-13672987-image-a-14_1721927037027.jpg)