WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In his latest major appointment, on Thursday Donald J. Trump nominated a new chief of the Central Intelligence Agency.

Speaking to reporters, Trump praised his nominee’s “extensive experience with Russia.”

“I have phone conversations with him every day, and he knows everything I know,” Trump told reporters. “Plus, the CIA won’t be the first spy agency he’s worked for.”

Citing another qualification of his nominee, Trump said, “He already has a great working relationship with Tulsi.”