Bullshit.

I'm calling "Bullshit"

Many here are pleased "Big Balls" took a beating at 3:00AM in DC. Fine, you can enjoy a bit of payback. That's why I posted this reporting. However, maintaining a news report is "bullshit," that it didn't happen, because you don't agree with the guy's politics, is the sort of thing MAGA morons do.

based on their own biased projections.

Because so far there's been no evidence presented, just an assertion.

do these people not know enough to get in the car at 3 AM, rather than hanging out on the street? Especially if there was a group of people approaching, or already there. Even if Mr. Small Testicles had not been out of his mother's basement before he came to DC to steal our data, oops, I mean eliminate fraud, hasn't he ever seen any movies?

And how did the story change? If he was protecting his SO, who made up the original report about him going to rescue a stranger, a woman in trouble? Was it the police? A writer or editor?

Musk is alleging a deep concussion but nobody went to hospital.

Musk's self-serving spin on this incident is "bullshit," as is Trump's "we have to federalize DC now!" authoritarian crappola. That was the point of this posting: to enjoy a bit of schadenfreude from Big Balls beat down, and maybe discuss the stupidity coming from Trump.

However, a number of people are claiming this attack didn't even happen, that it's "fake news," a "lie," a "false flag stunt," and "bullshit." Others are saying it was a "drug deal" gone wrong, or the woman was a "prostitute." Some people always choose to believe things without any evidence or facts, others steadfastly cling to their paranoid conspiracy theories and delusions. Is that what this site has become?

Fuk them

risking his life. Then getting beaten up for his bravery.

Sure.

One wonders what they were doing out that late. Or where this woman came from (you can guess what I'm implying here).

"Coristine was assaulted around 3 a.m. Sunday in the city’s Logan Circle neighborhood by a group of teenagers attempting to carjack him and a woman whom police identified as his significant other, according to authorities."

"The Metropolitan Police Department said the group approached the couple’s car and made a comment about taking it. Coristine pushed the woman into the vehicle for safety and turned to confront the group. At least several of the teens then attacked him, police said, until officers patrolling nearby intervened. As officers moved toward the group, the teens fled on foot."

From ABC: "The victim who was assaulted was Edward Coristine, according to an incident report provided by the Metropolitan Police Department. Coristine worked under Musk at DOGE until June, when Musk left the Trump administration, sources familiar with Coristine's employment told ABC News."

"The attempted carjacking unfolded early Sunday in northwest Washington, D.C., according to a police statement. Coristine and a woman were standing next to their car on Swann Street, several blocks from Logan Circle, when they were allegedly accosted by the multiple suspects, according to police."

From The Hill: "Authorities said the 15-year-old suspects, who were charged with unarmed carjacking, were among several teens who allegedly approached the victim, Edward Coristine, and a woman police identified as his significant other near a car around 3 a.m. EDT Sunday in Washington’s Logan Circle neighborhood."

"The group allegedly made comments about taking the car, before Coristine pushed his significant other into the vehicle for safety and prepared to confront the group, according to police."

And for the sake of efficiency.... "what really happened!?"

up and they are going to accuse you of being MAGA. Happens every time I try to tell the truth here.
I've even had a post remove for linking a .gov court ruling as "right wing talking points".
Manufactured reality seems preferred to some.

victim, or Trump, or something else? Discussing the various possible scenarios involved is one thing, but steadfastly refusing to admit it even happened is just bizarre.

Something he’s been alluding to doing and now all of a sudden he has “just cause.”

He’s so “lucky”.

'Trump Threatens Federal Takeover of Washington After Member of DOGE Is Assaulted'

"President Trump shared a photograph that appeared to show a 19-year-old software engineer shirtless and bloodied, after an attempted carjacking in the capital."

Paywall article:

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/05/us/politics/trump-doge-member-assaulted.html

Trump now wants to take over DC because "Big Balls" was attacked.

furthers the grifters agenda to take over DC.

Or could be something else sketchy, like a drug deal gone bad at 3 am, as posited by another DUer.

Either way - something is sketchy here.

He was out looking for a good time and screwed with the wrong people.

And should be able to without being bothered. I wonder what kind of car it was. Tesla? I wonder if he called them names, said or did something provocative. I remember Kristi Noem with her expensive handbag and $3000 in cash and she just left it laying on the floor.

If they were riding the subway, it wouldn't have happened

Its pretty sketchy too, but not as bad as 14th St at 3AM sketchy though.

He should get worse. I’d just call it fake news to annoy the MAGAs.

I think this is a false flag stunt to enable more fascism by Trump. If not, I'm glad they kicked his ass.

"According to a report from DC’s Metropolitan Police Department, two people were arrested in connection to the incident, described as a carjacking, between 3:01 and 4:20 am on the morning of Sunday, August 3. The location of the alleged incident is in the northwest region of Logan Circle, a well-known and relatively central area of the city."

"In addition to Coristine, the report references Emily Bryant as a second victim and describes her as Coristine’s 'significant other.' A DOGE affiliate named Emily Bryant has been linked to the Federal Trade Commission, the General Services Administration, and the Executive Office of the President."

"According to the police report, officers patrolling the area of the alleged crime 'observed a group of approximately 10 juveniles surrounding the complainants’ vehicle,' before allegedly assaulting one of the two victims."

"The report also claims that Coristine 'saw the suspects approach and make a comment about taking the vehicle.' It claims that Coristine then 'pushed' Bryant into the car. Then, according to the report, Coristine 'turned to deal with the suspects.' The suspects then began to assault [him]."

"The police claim that Coristine and Bryant were able to positively identify two of the alleged suspects. At that point, the report claims that those two subjects 'were placed under arrest for unarmed carjacking' and transported to the local 'JPC,' possibly the Juvenile Processing Center, to be processed."

"When the police officers exited their vehicle, the report claims that when the juveniles were 'observed' by the officers, they 'began fleeing on foot.' Officers were able to stop just two of the subjects."

😂

I hope “Big Balls” never lives it down

This happens every day somewhere in every state (where someone gets beaten up)

I thought these DOGE guys had their own security?

This 'story' totally reeks, especially if you see the way they are trying to push the 'story' with this BS:

Elon Musk, the former head of DOGE, claimed on X that “a gang of about a dozen young men tried to assault a woman in her car at night in DC,” and that “A @Doge team member saw what was happening, ran to defend her and was severely beaten to the point of concussion, but he saved her.”

Either the entire thing was staged, and it is fake blood (like the ear thing), or, they are making more of a common situation (someone mouths off and gets punched in the face).

I'm saying this without seeing any photos. I don't believe it for a second, but I fear how this incident will be used to allow TSF to 'Take over DC'

And he defeated 33 of them in manly hand-to-hand combat until the two 15-year-olds tripped him and he fell on his face.

was protecting anybody.

"A DOGE affiliate named Emily Bryant has been linked to the Federal Trade Commission, the General Services Administration, and the Executive Office of the President."

Is it enough evidence to charge car jacking if Big Balls claims he heard one of the teens say he/she was going to take his car? Did the gang actually try to take his car? Just asking what the law is.

(Business Insider, August 6, 2025) "A key member of the Department of Government Efficiency was attacked in an attempted carjacking in Washington, DC, over the weekend, authorities said — and a newly-released police report sheds light on what the staffer said happened."

"Business Insider obtained a copy of the incident report from the Metropolitan Police Department."

"The police report says that around 3 a.m. on Sunday, MPD officers in a cruiser saw a group of about 10 young people surrounding Coristine's car and assaulting him."

"The officers quickly intervened, and the suspects started to run, according to the incident report. Police were able to stop two of them — a 15-year-old boy and a 15-year-old girl — who they later arrested on a charge of unarmed carjacking."

"Coristine told police that the group approached him and a woman, identified in the report as his 'significant other,' and made a comment about taking the vehicle, the police report said."

" 'At that point, for her safety, he pushed his significant other' into the vehicle 'and turned to deal with the suspects,' the police report said, adding that the assailants then began to beat Coristine."

"The police report says that an iPhone 16 was stolen during the incident."

"Coristine was treated at the scene for his injuries by emergency responders, police said."

"A spokesperson for the Metropolitan Police Department told Business Insider that its incident report is accurate and contains no errors."

I believe Mr. Ball's version of events is utter bullshit, though.

Musk's version of the incident and Trump's lies about the horrible crime rate in DC were utter bullshit. But for Trump's demagoguery about federalizing DC because of all the carnage, even posting a graphic image of Big Balls bloody beat down, this would have been just another case of simple assault.

Also - Trump is in the Epstein Files.