confrontation. I just wish people like this could at least be TOLD (rationally and quietly) how much their thoughtless and/or oblivious driving behavior endangers other people. The problem is that when something like this happens, one is not in a very good state to explain something convincingly.

So glad you're OK, and better than OK, given your self-control in this hair-raising situation. You should be telling us how you did it, not the other way around.

Avoiding the accident happened so fast (even though it felt like an eternity), my memory is spotty. I remember thinking that I had to get around the car, because even though I was breaking, I was headed right towards it. Since cornering and breaking at the same time is a bad idea (you have to divide your traction between breaking and cornering), I let off the locked up back break (another bad idea, as you're begging for a high-side accident), knowing I stood a pretty good chance at getting tossed, but I was out of options. The bike kicked me, but I didn't get tossed. I honestly don't remember the details of the swerve.

As for not yelling, I can't say what calmed me. Maybe that time it took to take my gear off was enough. At that point I felt sick, and had the overwhelming thought that whatever I was going to do was a bad idea. Not 100% on that, but I vividly remember that her apparent apprehension made me feel ill for making her feel that way. Weird, but that's how I felt.

If the answer is no, then I know I am not thinking rationally.

You saved your own skin, saved a lady from a confrontation with scary looking biker and rode off into the sunset.
Is your bike named Silver?
Is your shootin' iron loaded with silver bullets?


In answer to your question, I'm not sure what I'd do but I can't think of anything that could improve on what you did.
I don't deal all that well with anger; maybe trying to visualize a cop's reaction to what I'd be thinking.

The fact that the lady was taking your picture means she must have realized what she did and been afraid of the confrontation. Hopefully she'll be more aware and an overall more connected driver.

a high-five to you

Hardly a hero and there is no time ever that I look like a scary biker. I weigh in at 150 and stand a hair under 6 foot. I was not all leather'ed up. In fact just a pair of Converse, come jeans and my favorite Live Simply t-shirt.

The bike is named Angel (my nickname for my wife).

My shooting iron was at home in the safe, and just regular leaded bullets.

I just feel like shit for going back. I never went near her, but I think that she was frightened.

Reactions quick enough to save yourself and prevent damage to any property.
Not a scary biker but probably frightened the lady.

You and bike are fine to continue taking care of yourselves and your family.

You're an average guy that was a hero for those short minutes. No parade, no medal, award or key to the city but an everyday hero for doing something difficult, not making a stink about it and probably making it look easy.

Ask yourself what qualifies some of the well known heroes as heroic.
If the shoe fits...

I consider my wife a warrior. She doesn't own a gun or serve in the military. She has a lot difficulty just walking but she beat the shit out cancer.

I appreciate your thoughts.

I ride, and like you, have come to the conclusion that everyone using their left turn signal is trying to kill me.

Given the choice, your family would prefer that you are scary and alive rather than invisible and dead.

I hope she feels equally "like shit" that she frightened you.

story time.
Many years ago I was stopped at a sign waiting for a break in freeway traffic (no onramp, just a stop sign for traffic entering a four lane highway). I looked in my rear-view because I wanted to see if it was prudent to wait for a friend approaching on the highway. All I could see in my mirror was rapidly approaching "YO". I dumped the clutch and released the brakes in an effort to get out of the way, but the toyota pickup hit and threw me onto the highway.

I picked myself up, verified that I was intact and wasn't in immediate peril of getting run over by the highway traffic, removed my helmet and turned to look at the car that hit me. The bumper was caved in, the grill was destroyed. the hood was v-notched and buckled about 8". A young woman got out of the truck, said "Oh shit, my mom is going to kill me."

I said "your mom is the least of your problems".

I'm a pretty benign guy, but in those days I spent quite a bit of time in the gym, I lifted a fair amount of weight, and I was wearing a tank-top and a nontrivial amount of road rash.

She looked at me for about 2 seconds, then silently returned to the truck and locked the doors.

The cop gave her a ticket for "failure to yield" which I considered a fairly light consequence of the dumbfuckery inherent in rear-ending a motorcycle at a stop sign.

I rode the bike home but the truck had to be towed. I hope she learned a lesson about sharing the road, as I learned a lesson about protective riding gear.
/story

I guess I didn't answer your question. I will say this; I think your anger served you appropriately, and that you exerted the right amount of control over it.

They make it so that during the times where the most clarity, control,
and reasoning could be useful, you often have the least.

We're wired for fight or flight as much as any other critter, and it takes
effort to find a third alternative. It's a skill, not a reflex.
Which is one way to deal with it. If you take pride in your ability to
control yourself (and you deserve to), sometimes it makes it an
easier skill to practice and use.

And motorcycles. Whew. Besides the obvious things (which sometimes
don't seem obvious to drivers) of the extreme exposures of riding one is
the mental effect of riding one. One reason for riding one is excitement,
which is another way of saying adrenaline. Whenever I'm on one, I remember
my state of mind, I'm already excited and pumped full of adrenaline, so I'm
already halfway there to a fight or flight moment.
I've made more than enough double u-turns as you have, wheeling around for
a confrontation of some sort before considering my state and doing my best
to forget it.

It's scary on both ends too (having been both victim and perpetrator of such
mistakes). You can at least hope that the fear (as it did for me) motivates them
to consider what just happened. "I could have just killed someone."And now, I will never
back up negligently again.
Some people don't reflect, but I have to hope for the sake of humanity that they
represent a small percentage of the world.

Keep you zen face on!

Whether it's online where I will type something, walk away and read what I was going to write before sending it, or in real life where I walk away from situations that anger me.

It's not worth it to let my temper get the best of me. I had a friend who once attempted to tell me that meant I wasn't mature enough to handle being angry, but I replied that it was a sign of maturity that I don't let the worst side of me out, even if I later still think they deserve it.

I remember what my anger has cost me in the past and it's easy to walk away. I don't have anything to prove in terms of toughness or anything like that. It's not that I'm afraid of the fight (physical or verbal), but I don't want to be that guy any more, always angry and willing to pick a fight with the world. I've got better shit to do. Yeah, people can be stupid and irritating, but most of them learned to be that way. I'm probably not going to teach them to be otherwise by being an ass.

I think for me the real turning point was at martial arts where a guy told me that his wife didn't want to spar with me because she thought I was scary and might hurt her. I was at first really angry that she thought I might intentionally hurt her, but then I thought about it and while I do have the colloquial bitchy resting face which isn't in my control, I did often let my anger out, and when you're trying to kick each other, that can be dangerous, especially given that I've been described as a tank.

I have a similar problem.

First of all, I am glad you were able to make the maneuver and came out of it unscathed.

I empathize with you. I live in South Korea and people drive with such reckless behavior the worst of which is not using their turn signal.

I was involved in an incident in March where a woman was in a u-turn lane, but was suppose to yield to the on coming traffic. She failed to do that and cause the car in front of me and myself to slam on our brakes. I made the mistake of speeding up and getting in front of her and slamming on my breaks twice before returning to a regular speed. She sped up and got in front of me and slammed on her breaks causing me to rear end her. We both pulled over and the second mistake I made was getting out of the car and screaming at the top of my lungs (though I didn't get close to her car). She refused to get out at that point and I left (another mistake). Eventually I was pulled over by the police and she accused me of being drunk. I was even more pissed and started yelling with half a dozen South Korean police present that I wanted to take a breathalyzer immediately (which I passed), then I told her I was going to sue her for slander. We went to the police station to file a report.

I had to go to another police station (closer to where the accident actually occurred) and sit there and discuss the whole thing. The whole thing revolved around a negotiation to try to "solve" it without police involvement. Needless to say I was the one holding my tongue and this time she sat there ranting and raving and it worked against her. My insurance paid for some of the damage and both of us ended up getting fined about 40,000 KRW (about $50) and were given 10 points on our driving record.

Not a good experience.

Working with the public will do that to you.

I'm not arguing with you, I'm just explaining why I'm right.

It has taken me a long time to be able to stop myself and let the anger pass. It's such a better way of handling anger.

When I was 25 or so I was sideswiped badly in my brand new truck.
I jumped out and ran over to the obviously stupid driver to scream at them.
I arrived at the other car to find a group of nuns returning to the convent,and quite shaken,
I instantly revert to the ten year old schoolboy,
" Are you all right sister, is there anything I can do for you?"
I still laugh thinking about how they deflated my anger with a glance