...even when I was a drunken college student, that wasn't how I operated. I ran with an extremely mellow, hippie crowd. I was never the 'fight' type. I vividly remember one night in college; it stands out because usually everyone in the circles we ran in were ultra cool-- where some jarheads were trying to start a fight with one of my friends, probably over his long hair or some stupid shit.. I grabbed this guy; I'm sure he thought I was going to hit him-- and I pulled him outside; it was a beautiful summer night and you could see the Milky Way-- and pointing at the sky, I said something like "shut up. shut up. shut up and just LOOK. You're tiny. All the bullshit you think is so important- is tiny. How can you be so pissed off- about ANYTHING- when you're just a speck in this great ocean of beauty and mystery?"

Needless to say I was high as a kite at the time. I don't think it worked but no one got their ass kicked either, so maybe some of what I was saying got through to the guy.

I'm a relatively big guy.. but it's just not how I look at things, nor has it ever been my idea of a good time. I've definitely had friends like that; they'd get drunk and look for fights, while I'd be off chatting up the pretty girls.

And if not then, perhaps later in life. I can think of several things said to me in my younger years which had attitude-changing impact only later in life.

If he wasn't too drunk to remember it.

It's about who could kick the shit outta me, not the other way around.

When I first enter a room, I look for people I know, then hot dudes, then nice clothes.

Mostly, with the guys, I would be checking whether any of them look like the sort that would be thinking about whether they could take me, with the idea of staying way the hell away from them. Long ago, I might have considered such questions as you propose, but I would have still been checking the women out first.

However, you are right, lots of guys do seem to think that way.

I'm not interested in fighting unless I'm challenged...then it becomes a necessary evil.

When I enter a room, I look at the guys....but not to see who I could beat.

Yes, I've known guys who approached life that way, but not many and none since I was young back in the day.

usually the first thing I scan for is the location of the bathroom.

Or when I visit a nursing home.

I'm not very tough.

But I am a socially shy person. On the other hand, I am not particularly meek when it comes to confrontation. In that sense, I guess that what I do is interact with people with the purpose of sizing up their mental processes. Lots of analysis going on.

Matrix 2: Electric Boogaloo (or something like that).

At least I don't think they think like this

Get some different friends, they seem unstable.

I find another room.

But i have met many so-called "G's" who really beleive that it is the ability to "knock someone out" or "Look at the size of my penis" that equates their manhood...there was one time this fool from africa actually said "pull down your pants and we will see who is more of a man" i couldn't stop laughing in his face due to the fact this person is suppose to have been "educated"...and still playing the "mine is bigger than yours" game from my childhood in chicago. When these type of blackmen stop equating power with these types of displays maybe we will see more true men rise up.

this pointless "mine is bigger" BS
Sadly a lot of those people become executives, and make the lives of techs like me hell... or non-existent.
I'm a great tech, but I have this instant ability to piss off executives w/o consciously trying.

it comes does to the whole "mine is bigger" mentality.

I know i'm a great tech, and I don't feel the need to point it out at work. I just do my job, greatly.
But I can't speak the proper language, and tend to be honest.... HUGE mistake.

men with the "mine is bigger" problem tend to dislike honesty. they fear and hate it, like sunlight to a vampire (Super bowl car commercial, funny as hell) and tend to keep it as far away as possible.

thus I loose a lot of jobs as soon as an executive gets involved.

that world of lying, bullshit, an deception is literally totally foreign to me, and one I am incapable of integrating into.

my rant is this... "mine is bigger" is the root cause of all our issues

and when I go into a room, depending on the situation, I look for my friends, a comfy place to stand/sit, and the exits... just in case

A lot of people in that night club in Rhode Island would be alive today if they just knew where all the exits were.

The 'who could I take' thought is usually second or third.

kids, you know.

Biker bar in a strange town? maybe
Unitarian church? nope
Portapotty? There shouldn't BE anyone in the room.

Or "BIFFF!"

I am a fast runner so when it ever comes to physical confrontation, I run and run and run. Believe me, there is no shame in running but if you back me against the all, I will kick ass.

That's a young man's game. Not that I'm old but I consider myself too dignified to engage in bar fights anymore. That shit hurts the next day, even if you win. I avoid fights at all costs unless I'm directly threatened and there is no other option.

Now my first thought is learning where the bathroom is.