--- another one of my mind ramblings. Feel free to click on to something else because this one is

going nowhere.

I was watching the Netflix doc. on Andy Warhol. There is the point about his sexuality and how he had to hide it as a kid.Then I got to thinking about my sexuality. (Or lack of it these days - I am 80 and the market for 80 year olds is not too hot.) From this point in time, I guess I will die, INCEL.

I am hetro. Nothing remarkable about that.. it just is. I don't come off as macho. Far from it. When I was about 18, my uncle tried to call me out.. "I think you are a queer."

My response: "That is a very nice invitation, Uncle Ben, but I don't do that." He never brought it up again.

Guys have hit on me in past. I do not accept their efforts. I just explain that it is not for me. It doesn't upset me...it just is. About 5 years ago, one of my friends hit on me. I declined. He asked if I was offended that he propositioned me. I told him that I wasn't. It was like if he had asked me to play a game of Curling. I wouldn't accept the invitation because I am not interested in Curling but I wouldn't be upset because you asked me if I wanted to play.

We are friends.... see each other a few times a month. He still sends passes at me, once or twice a year, more in a sense of humor now.

Which then brings me to where this is going. It was about 15 years ago, I was in a small NYC venue and the show was "The Mcgarrigle Family." This included Rufus Wainwright. Joyce and I got there early and sound check and such were going on. Rufus was setting up on stage and he commented about some hot guy in the back of the room. This pissed me off because he wasn't hitting on me. I would not have responded to a pass except to smile and maybe acknowledge him with a smile.. but still, I was pissed that he wasn't attracted to me.

Now why, do you suppose, is that?