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Jilly_in_VA

(10,845 posts)
Mon Mar 7, 2022, 01:07 PM Mar 2022

My pregnancy complications were described in sexist terms, unlike male infertility

“Your cervix is in danger of effacing. You’ll be tremendously lucky if your baby makes it to 24 weeks.”

I was staring at the doctor who had just delivered this news, but I was having trouble processing what she was saying. She nonchalantly added something about my “incompetent cervix.” A wave of devastation swept over me and my face flushed with humiliation. My first thought was, “Did I somehow cause this?”
Just the day before, I had been standing in front of an ornate mansion in New York City admiring an abundance of yellow daffodils when I felt a sharp pain in my lower belly. I was four months pregnant and hardly showing my baby bump. My husband and I had been walking around for hours, and I thought perhaps I had overdone it.

On the ride back to our Hudson Valley farmhouse, the pain persisted, so I called my OB-GYN. The nurse dismissed me outright, telling me that aches and pains were normal and that I should wait for my scheduled appointment the next evening to address any concerns. By the time I walked into the doctor’s office, it felt like a stack of bricks was bearing down on my uterus.

An emergency sonogram showed that I had three unusually large fibroids — noncancerous tumors made up of smooth muscle cells — and one was pressing against my cervix, causing early effacement (meaning my cervix was shorter than normal and not strong enough to stay closed during my pregnancy as it needs to).

Just the day before, I had been standing in front of an ornate mansion in New York City admiring an abundance of yellow daffodils when I felt a sharp pain in my lower belly. I was four months pregnant and hardly showing my baby bump. My husband and I had been walking around for hours, and I thought perhaps I had overdone it.

On the ride back to our Hudson Valley farmhouse, the pain persisted, so I called my OB-GYN. The nurse dismissed me outright, telling me that aches and pains were normal and that I should wait for my scheduled appointment the next evening to address any concerns. By the time I walked into the doctor’s office, it felt like a stack of bricks was bearing down on my uterus.

An emergency sonogram showed that I had three unusually large fibroids — noncancerous tumors made up of smooth muscle cells — and one was pressing against my cervix, causing early effacement (meaning my cervix was shorter than normal and not strong enough to stay closed during my pregnancy as it needs to).

After the doctor delivered her devastating diagnosis, she told me to spend the remaining five months in bed, keep my hips elevated and stay that way until the baby started to crown. With no other information forthcoming, my husband, my incompetent cervix and I all drove home in silence.

https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/women-face-sexist-medical-terms-when-dealing-pregnancy-it-s-ncna1291025
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When I got pregnant at 34(!!!) it was described as a "geriatric pregnancy", FFS!

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My pregnancy complications were described in sexist terms, unlike male infertility (Original Post) Jilly_in_VA Mar 2022 OP
I had two "geriatric pregnancies" leftieNanner Mar 2022 #1
Just as in the post above, my two pregnancies were at 38 and 41. 3catwoman3 Mar 2022 #2
Oh yeah, same here Diamond_Dog Mar 2022 #3
I guess I didn't qualify as "geriatric." ShazzieB Mar 2022 #4
This is a serious question Jilly_in_VA Mar 2022 #5

leftieNanner

(15,674 posts)
1. I had two "geriatric pregnancies"
Mon Mar 7, 2022, 01:13 PM
Mar 2022

Ages 38 and 41.

I like to think of them as pregnancies of wisdom.

Got two great kids out of the deal too!

Greetings from one geezer to another.

3catwoman3

(25,388 posts)
2. Just as in the post above, my two pregnancies were at 38 and 41.
Mon Mar 7, 2022, 01:20 PM
Mar 2022

The term used for the first one was "elderly primigravida." ELDERLY??? I found it very insulting.

How about "mature"?

ShazzieB

(18,559 posts)
4. I guess I didn't qualify as "geriatric."
Mon Mar 7, 2022, 05:53 PM
Mar 2022

I was "only" 35 when my daughter was born, but even that was enough to get me labeled an "elderly primapara," a designation I did NOT appreciate.

It's high time the medical profession stopped labeling women as decrepit old fossils for giving birth past some approved age. Yes, certain risks do increase with age, but those can be managed without using insulting terminology.

Jilly_in_VA

(10,845 posts)
5. This is a serious question
Tue Mar 8, 2022, 10:18 AM
Mar 2022

Does anyone think that these terms are used because men have been in control of the medical profession for so many years, or is it something else? I don't mean this to become an anti-male rant.

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