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retrowire

(10,345 posts)
Tue Aug 2, 2016, 08:06 AM Aug 2016

If men were so strong...

Then why do so many of them need a woman's attention in order to have self esteem? Can they not stand on their own?

Why are so many of their egos bruised by the idea of not being found desirable by the opposing gender? Can they not recognize how awesome they can be on their own?

Why do so many men feel that women need to cover up or dress a certain way? Because they can't control themselves to simply look away or acknowledge that a woman is simply another person?

Why can't my wife wear lipstick without it being assumed that her looks are for men to consume and not for her to simply enjoy her own style?

Why can't so many men simply be strong and stand on their own?

To see the world for what it is and accept it, rather than try and bend it and overpower it to a shape that they are comfortable with?

Real strength comes from acknowledging what's wrong with this world and ourselves. And seeking to change what we can, while accepting that which we cannot change.

I've known too many weak men to believe that men are strong.

My mother was beaten by my father in front of me when I was a child. She stayed. She protected me. He cried. He drank himself to sleep and woke up in a drunken haze calling for his mother when he felt sick. His mother wasn't there, he was calling his wife "mom".

So I've known too many men that live a life like this. Blame women for your problems, overpower them and then when you stumble and fall, you need your mother.

I know very few strong men.

But I know a lot of strong women.

Thank you.

10 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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If men were so strong... (Original Post) retrowire Aug 2016 OP
I agree 100%. nt Nay Aug 2016 #1
This message was self-deleted by its author Hiraeth Aug 2016 #2
well thats why i use words like "so many" or "most" nt retrowire Aug 2016 #3
This message was self-deleted by its author Hiraeth Aug 2016 #4
i think i made the mistake of reading your post in a defensive tone retrowire Aug 2016 #5
This message was self-deleted by its author radicalliberal Aug 2016 #6
Thank you for that Warpy Aug 2016 #7
the entitlement issue is male toxicity syndrome retrowire Aug 2016 #8
^ BlancheSplanchnik Aug 2016 #9
Your third point is one that really irks me. CrispyQ Oct 2016 #10

Response to retrowire (Original post)

Response to retrowire (Reply #3)

retrowire

(10,345 posts)
5. i think i made the mistake of reading your post in a defensive tone
Tue Aug 2, 2016, 09:54 AM
Aug 2016

When it wasn't.

My apologies! The internet got me again!

Response to retrowire (Original post)

Warpy

(113,093 posts)
7. Thank you for that
Tue Aug 2, 2016, 10:09 AM
Aug 2016

And why do so many of them think we owe them something just because they're attracted to us?

There are a lot of compelling reasons that had me living with a cat for much of my adult life.

retrowire

(10,345 posts)
8. the entitlement issue is male toxicity syndrome
Tue Aug 2, 2016, 10:14 AM
Aug 2016

And that is a social issue that feminism tackles to save both women and men.

Men are victims of a mindset that we HAVE to be powerful we HAVE to be leaders we HAVE to have sex to be credible.

It's kind of the flip side of what women deal with. Women HAVE to be prim and pretty and thin or they HAVE to be subservient or less intelligent.

We men and women have to act together to get rid of this stigma on society. We need to raise our sons to know that they don't have to be buff or powerful to be their best and that will help our sons understand the world when they see the daughters that were raised to understand they don't have to wear dresses or makeup. They don't have to serve a man.

And thus the children will grow to see equals in one another.

CrispyQ

(38,025 posts)
10. Your third point is one that really irks me.
Wed Oct 19, 2016, 11:21 AM
Oct 2016

These types of men think they are superior to women, but lack the self control to be around a scantily clad woman.

"Men fear women will laugh at them. Women fear men will kill them." ~Margaret Atwood

She actually interviewed groups of men & women before she came up with that.

Here's a really great interview with Gloria Steinem. It's dated - on a page for a PBS special about violence against women back in the 90s, but worth the read.

http://www.pbs.org/kued/nosafeplace/interv/steinem.html

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