Addiction & Recovery

Ilsa

(62,231 posts) Wed Dec 3, 2014, 09:20 AM Dec 2014

Dealing with a lot of frustration today.

A family member was sentenced yesterday for parole violation on a felony theft charge. Her parole violation was a DUI where she had a head-on collision and totalled two cars, including the car she "borrowed" from another family member. Thankfully, no one was severely injured in the accident.

The judge could have sentenced her to two years, in a facility that would have gotten her the help she needs for her drug addiction. But he went easy on her and gave her more probation. I hope she doesn't get killed before she violates probation again.

6 replies

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Dealing with a lot of frustration today. (Original Post) Ilsa Dec 2014 OP

Ouch. I think that would be my reaction, too. TygrBright Dec 2014 #1

I agree with Tyger..She needs immediate professional help, (but she needs to say yes to that) Stuart G Dec 2014 #2

Spot on...thank you, see my reply below Tyger's. nt Ilsa Dec 2014 #4

Thank you for your reply and words of wisdom. Ilsa Dec 2014 #3

I hope she doesn't kill or maim someone else before she gets help. . . Journeyman Dec 2014 #5

Amen. Unfortunately, there is an enabler in Ilsa Dec 2014 #6

TygrBright

(20,987 posts)

1. Ouch. I think that would be my reaction, too.

Reply to Ilsa (Original post)

Wed Dec 3, 2014, 09:40 AM

Dec 2014

Judges can be astonishingly ignorant sometimes, even the well-intentioned ones.

That said, deep breath and Step One.

What can you control in this situation? What can your frustration and elevated cortisol levels do to improve things?

Hang in there.

ruefully,
Bright

Stuart G

(38,726 posts)

2. I agree with Tyger..She needs immediate professional help, (but she needs to say yes to that)

Reply to TygrBright (Reply #1)

Wed Dec 3, 2014, 10:10 AM

Dec 2014

and also, deep breathing does help us get thru this day...That is all we have..We cannot change others, we need to change ourselves.

Ilsa

(62,231 posts)

4. Spot on...thank you, see my reply below Tyger's. nt

Reply to Stuart G (Reply #2)

Wed Dec 3, 2014, 04:19 PM

Dec 2014

Ilsa

(62,231 posts)

3. Thank you for your reply and words of wisdom.

Reply to TygrBright (Reply #1)

Wed Dec 3, 2014, 04:18 PM

Dec 2014

There is very little any of us can do except try to anticipate her next move and prepare for it. There are a few enablers around that she will likely turn to...
Deep breath...
Calmness...prayer...hope...yoga...
Deep breath...

Journeyman

(15,143 posts)

5. I hope she doesn't kill or maim someone else before she gets help. . .

Reply to Ilsa (Original post)

Wed Dec 3, 2014, 06:46 PM

Dec 2014

I wish her all the best and pray she finds her way to the help she needs soon.

Ilsa

(62,231 posts)

6. Amen. Unfortunately, there is an enabler in

Reply to Journeyman (Reply #5)

Wed Dec 3, 2014, 08:21 PM

Dec 2014

the family (elderly and forgetful, too shortsighted) who is easily taken advantage of, so when she steals from the enabler, the enabler refuses to press charges. If the enabler had done so in the past, the girl would be exiting prison about now, possibly reformed and sober.

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