Cancer Support
Related: About this forumMy Lit Candles
Twelve years ago when I was first diagnosed with breast cancer I was invited a cancer event. My husband, daughter and I were scared to death when we got there. We started over to the Kaiser group and I met Mary. At the time I stood 5'5 inches and Mary made me look tall. Mary was a tiny woman with big blue eyes and white hair.
The first thing she said to me was something like, "Child, there is no reason to be afraid. You and me are gonna beat this sh*t back." and I believed her. She was a three time cancer survivor and had had a couple of heart surgeries. Mary had just gotten back from Alaska where she had been hiking and camping. I was in awe. Every person diagnosed with cancer should have a Mary in their life.
Mary told me to buy some candles and to light them every night. One candle was for those fighting, in general. The second one was for those who were no longer with us so they would see they were still loved and remembered and the third for myself. Over the years I hav bought candles for specific people and they always know. She taught me the phrase-can't hurt and might help. So I have been lighting candles for 12 1/2 years even in the heat of the summer.
I light candles for you fighting cancer and your care givers with love in my heart. We walk the path of life together and sometimes we all need a little candle light to show us the way.
Peace and Love to all of you. My sweet Mary passed away three years ago on her sleep. Her body was tired and she left all of us grieving for her but being so thankful she came into our lives. I still shed a few tears but have a smile in my heart when I light Mary's candle.
Uben
(7,719 posts)I light candles too, but in a different manner. After my wife's breast cancer surgery (8 yrs ago) she wanted a prayer chapel. So, I built her one. Nothing big, just an eight by ten with a pitched roof. I rocked the exterior with rocks she selected, made wooden shudders for the arched windows and made a beautiful arched door. She is a stained-glass artist and made some very beautiful glass for the three arched windows behind the altar. It has a belfry, too, with bells she got in Santa FE, NM.
Since we live in a gated lake community, we opened it up to the public because there is no church at the lake. Alot of folks have used it.. We leave a prayer box and candles for folks to use. There is no electricity, but we have a couple of oil lamps they can light after dark. It's always open. It gives those with troubles a place to go and pray.
You and your wife are wonderful people. I am finding it difficult to find the words that could convey to you how touched I am reading your story. What a great gift you gave your wife and then the community. Bless you.
Uben
(7,719 posts)I don't think the chapel was finished at this point, but it was close. We have four lots here at the lake, and my wife selected this location for the chapel.
In this pic, you can see the model my wife made of what she wanted the chapel to look like. It is sitting on top of one of the windows she made. The windows were made before the chapel, so I just built it around the windows.
Irishonly
(3,344 posts)The surrounding area seems so peaceful. Thank you for sharing.
jumptheshadow
(3,311 posts)Thank you, the stories and the chapel are beautiful. What a great contribution to the site!
dmr
(28,645 posts)I am speechless.
A loving & giving heart is a beautiful thing.
cynannmarie
(113 posts)totally lovely in thought and execution. Thank you for letting us see. Just love this.
maddezmom
(135,060 posts)and you brought it all to fruition. What a wonderful place for everyone connected to the community, religion or just a peaceful place thoughts.
Uben
(7,719 posts)I'm color blind and have zero artistic talent, but I spent a few years hammering nails and cutting boards when I was younger. I had never done rock work or plastering, but thanks to the internet, I learned enough to get the job done.
Carol has made many beautiful glass projects (she taught herself). She likes to do it because she says she likes the thought of her art outliving her, and it takes her mind off the other woes of the world. She has given most of it away and has never sold a piece.
edit: After the chapel was finished, a lady from the tax appraisal office stopped by when she noticed it. I thought, "Okay, their gonna hit me for this, now." To my surprise, she asked if anyone could use the chapel. I told her yes, and she said, "I'm listing this as a storage building." It had no effect on my taxes. That is also why there is no electricity to the structure. But, I used extension cords for a couple of flood llights to illuminate it at night. It is so serene at night with the oil lamps burning and the art glass illuminated by the floods outside.