Tho hard. Possibly this person got delayed or is writing an equally long response and hasn’t finished…

Could be, but I doubt it. He sent a short video of his grandson. I was oh how cute, I wish we could visit each other. Guess that was the kiss of death for me

I'd just ignore it and wait and see what happens, if they wan't to reach out they will contact you again.

Has he not seen her in decades either? Maybe he wrote back to her initially because of that.

Either way try not to get upset because you really have no idea what happened here. "Excuse them rather than accuse them for the sake of your mental health"

because you don't know, and you really don't want to know if it's negative.

Perhaps it's time to set the worry aside and just keep chatting, you never know what others are going though - just like us.
Right?

In a few days. Then its worse when there's silence

I can't understand when someone uses messenger, but maybe that's just me.

If not, resend your initial response and see what happens. If no personal response then, don't worry about it...DU will respond.

It was obvious it was I and she. To make me feel shittier, the cousin he responded to drives to visit me when there's a friend of hers to visit. I'm kinda the third wheel afterthought. Not having a good day. Anyway, she'll visit but we'll be meeting her friend Holly.

Chin up and think of yourself as the star that you are.

It’s absolutely true that in many (most?) families, there is someone who is the designated punching bag, and the family agrees it is a good thing and absolutely right to abuse that victim, over and over, for decades.

I was the designated punching bag for my extended family, and my only chance for happiness was going no contact with all of them.

If you are the one who always gets mistreated by your extended family, you don’t deserve it…and it’s okay to walk away from continued abuse.

because you accidentally deleted it and need to be reminded of something that was in it? You said you didn't want to respond again, but you could determine if something's off?

I understand that being ignored sucks, though. I didn't get any communication from any of my relatives - not even siblings - on Christmas. Not a phone call, not an email, nada. I don't think my nieces and their kids could even pick me out of a lineup. It's probably my fault for not trying harder at my end. But it sucks anyhow.

you STILL did right.

DU is a responsive place, you're right.

I'm reminded of a famous quote, the opening of Leo Tolstoy's novel Anna Karenina: "All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."

Saying nothing about my own unhappy family at the moment.
Sending you another big hug.

so you haven't lost anything but the fantasy of a reunion with a relative who's ghosted you for decades.

If he gets around to contacting you now that the holidays are winding down, that's great. If not, that's OK, too, you've still got the cousin he did respond to. You'll get a report.

You might not be in the best head space right now, but you're not the one with something essentially wrong. with you. Let go of the fantasy, those never work out, anyway, people are too complicated. Just take it as it comes, if it comes. If you do meet again and he's not who you remember, try to remember you're not the hero worshiping kid any more, either.

Don't take this personally, it's most likely not personal, at all.

an only child, have just one daughter. Most of my cousins are magats or racist pricks, so I'm better off alone. I avoid confrontation with stupid people, even family, because it's a waste of time. Your story is puzzling; why would someone contact you, only to ghost you after you reply? Please don't go thinking something is wrong with you! You were sweet and kind by replying to his message.

In my mind, if someone does not reply to me without a good reason and is ghosting me, it makes me see them in a clear manner for who they really are. Not replying to someone is evidence of emotional and situational cowards. It is easier to blow someone off than to do introspection. I hope your cousin is not one of these people and answers you.

Hugs!