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BeHereNow

(17,162 posts)
Fri Dec 30, 2011, 12:40 AM Dec 2011

Need to run something by you friends-

Just walked the fabulous fur person with my husband-
Talked about what I have been choosing, which is basically
hiding out, reclusive behavior.
I am fine with it, as I explained to my husband.
It feels right in a world of trouble.
I like the company of my fur people, not so much my so called "friends"
who all feel like energy vampires at this point in my life.
I have one friend of 25 years who calls only to talk about his troubles-
I've offered what I consider pretty good advice over the years- never taken.
In the mean while I have experienced significant personal crisis with my
beloved daughter and her mental illness problems- no one ever seems to ask-
"How are you doing?" More like "It's your fault," and by the way,
can you give me a ride from the airport-
Or endless tirades about bad dates- you name it.
I feel really safe right now- hiding out in my "cave."
Absolutely NOTHING in my life has turned out as I hoped it would-
I think it right to be able to grieve that reality in private
without the vampires trying to take my time and energy-
Calling, asking why I haven't called back-
I don't call back because I don't get what I need from
those people- it's all about them.
There is never room in their conversations for Me.
Thanks for letting me vent-
BHN

9 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Need to run something by you friends- (Original Post) BeHereNow Dec 2011 OP
Soundtrack for this post- BeHereNow Dec 2011 #1
Sounds ok, Be, as it 'feels right.' elleng Dec 2011 #2
Thank Ellen- it does feel right. BeHereNow Dec 2011 #5
Define fur people. Neoma Dec 2011 #3
Cats, a dog and horses- the only honest people I know. BeHereNow Dec 2011 #4
Additional disclosure- I live in LA, the most emotionally toxic city on the palnet. BeHereNow Dec 2011 #6
take care of yourself fizzgig Dec 2011 #7
It's okay to make a space for yourself to do what you need to do EFerrari Dec 2011 #8
I think it is perfectly all right to choose solitude. murielm99 Dec 2011 #9

BeHereNow

(17,162 posts)
5. Thank Ellen- it does feel right.
Fri Dec 30, 2011, 12:59 AM
Dec 2011

I guess on some level, I am asking permission to retreat.
So, thank you.
BHN

BeHereNow

(17,162 posts)
4. Cats, a dog and horses- the only honest people I know.
Fri Dec 30, 2011, 12:58 AM
Dec 2011

They don't judge, they don't blame-
They simply love you as you are.
Who could ask for anything more?
BHN

BeHereNow

(17,162 posts)
6. Additional disclosure- I live in LA, the most emotionally toxic city on the palnet.
Fri Dec 30, 2011, 02:16 AM
Dec 2011

All the people I sincerely have loved, musicians, have died.
The loss I feel is so great, words cannot describe.
Haven't picked up a guitar or hit my piano in nearly 6 months...
and I have some bitch assed instruments.

Crying at the loss of my interest of what used to be my life.

BHN

On edit: spell / grammar etc..

murielm99

(31,436 posts)
9. I think it is perfectly all right to choose solitude.
Sat Dec 31, 2011, 01:28 AM
Dec 2011

If you need it to heal, that is good. If you need it to feel whole, that is fine, too. If other humans are not giving, stay away from them.

If the time comes that you need to emerge more in the world, God, the universe, whatever power you believe in, will let you know.

I see what you are doing as right and acceptable. I do it myself, as needed.

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