Reminds me of how pouring Dr. Pepper on your car's battery terminals will eat away the battery acid buildup.

is my preferred, (though not quite so much as to induce the ole volcano from science class), but whatever works!

Pour a cup down a sluggish drain, let it sit half an hour, pour boiling water down the drain.
It will eat anything you’ve got in there.
Not sure what it’s doing to the pipes.

screwing up the floria in my septic.

I've good luck with the Drano Max gel.