Unless you need a nurse and constant help.

she mentioned how important it is to have a trusted advocate on the "outside".

any one you trust?

My kids don't want me to consider living someplace other than with them, if I need that kind of help. I took care of several older relatives, and I hope my kids don't need to help me. They would always be there for me, no matter where I am. I saw something that reminded me that my age group rely on the Internet as much as our kids, grandkids and the generations coming up. They wanted their MTV, I want my Internet! Lol

SEPTEMBER 27, 2023
WiFi Considered a Basic Standard in Nursing Homes

"The Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) considers WiFi a basic standard of convenience and comfort that any individual could expect in their home and are therefore considering ways to ensure WiFi access for all residents in all nursing homes.

"If your nursing home does not have facility-wide WiFi access for all nursing home residents, please complete Attachment C from this memo and email to CMS at CMP-Info@cms.hhs.gov no later than December 22, 2023. CMS will use this information to evaluate whether CMP Reinvestment Program funds could be used for this purpose."

https://leadingage.org/wifi-considered-a-basic-standard-in-nursing-homes/

If we end up in a nursing home, hopefully we'll still be cogent and interested in the outside. Unfortunately, most of us will end up in a Medicaid nursing home when we are really ill. Take care.

Thank you!

has WiFi. When she first went there, she was able to use her personal laptop to access her regular news channels, and I set up her streaming services for her. We also got her a phone service that was specifically for seniors with dementia, and I was able to limit her outgoing calls and calling times in order to avoid the issues you mentioned. Since then, her dementia has progressed to the point where none of that matters to her anymore.

I hope that you are not faced with the issues she has been, and that you are able to continue to use WiFi and the internet.

Peace

... if you don't mind sharing.

My mom may not be quite at that point yet, but I've noticed that she's letting dad do most of the talking when I call them these days. So I'm wondering if a phone/plan more suited to her new limitations might encourage her to connect more...

RAZ Mobility phone. It can work with any service or with their service. You have a lot of options for how you set up the interface. What it doesn’t have is internet access. It’s a phone only, not a smartphone.

https://leadingage.org/wifi-considered-a-basic-standard-in-nursing-homes/

'If your nursing home does not have facility-wide WiFi access for all nursing home residents, please complete Attachment C from this memo and email to CMS at CMP-Info@cms.hhs.gov no later than December 22, 2023. CMS will use this information to evaluate whether CMP Reinvestment Program funds could be used for this purpose."

https://ltcombudsman.org/about/about-ombudsman

'Long-term care Ombudsmen are advocates for residents of nursing homes, board and care homes and assisted living facilities. Ombudsmen provide information about how to find a facility and what to do to get quality care. They are trained to resolve problems. If you want, the Ombudsman can assist you with complaints. However, unless you give the Ombudsman permission to share your concerns, these matters are kept confidential. Under the federal Older Americans Act, every state is required to have an Ombudsman Program that addresses complaints and advocates for improvements in the long-term care system.'

My Words: I was a volunteer with this program in FL and, believe me, nursing home staff 'snap to it' when we walk in the door. They don't want us writing them up for an violations that we suspect that will send a regulatory agency in for a full review.

in their late 80s. The first one was huge with lost of floors, well advertised and expensive. It sucked with changing staff all of the time. After dad died, I moved mom to a small local unit. 1/3 the price and the was much better. Plus it was.closer to me and I could visit everyday instead of just weekends. She had the same caregivers everyday and nothing ever came up missing.
Best of luck.

They have WiFi but it’s terrible which means they have no WIFI.

My hope it’s the least of your concerns.

Cheers

I have the same hope for all of us!

Nobody can restrict your communication. I just finally got my dad into an access restricted but semi-independent home (memory-safe) and he’s got a brand new huge TV, complete WiFi and balcony with the freedom to walk to the farmers market two blocks away and several upscale restaurants and vendors across the street. He and I talk dozens of times a day when I’m not there. There’s a community room that he can chat with the few other residents and have coffee and a bagel while going out on the gardened roof to attempt pickleball. I cook most of his food but he is free to cook for himself. It’s just an apartment with all the amenities you’d expect. Nobody will ever restrict you from having a phone or anything else, and nobody can stop you from either calling family or going home. You’re a grown-ass adult.

Edit to add: I understand, after helping my dad through a similar transition, how much anxiety it can inspire. The assumption that you’re no longer going to be self-sufficient, which you’ve been all your life, I’ve seen first-hand and it doesn’t need to be terrifying.

Dad is extremely happy in his new home. He’s independent, has freedom, he’s free to come and go (sometimes with supervision - me), cooks and eats what he wants for himself, has friends, watches baseball all day (that’s our sport), socializes with fellow residents and talks on the phone with his extended family every day. Nobody will ever take that away from you. It only costs my trust $7200/month, but that’s why I built a trust.

Im usually the one to drive him to dialysis at 05:00, but my sister picks him up at 10:30 most days, then he’ll sleep after a bit to eat and I’ll send him a text about the days game and he’ll reply. We just went to an MiLB game last week and he was SO happy!

It’s just an apartment. Do what you like, and good luck! Best to you.

Considering the spectrum of care facilities and not knowing your situation, I should add that after dad’s last big hospital stay he was in a convalescent home basically tied to a bed.

He insisted upon driving himself home from dialysis one day, had a massive heart attack two blocks from his home, totaled his car and 5 parked cars not far from his then apartment. (I know he often suffered from hypotensive syncope after dialysis which is what I suspect happened). He somehow made his way home and the police found him unresponsive. As he was convalescing he did have full access, but it was at his request and he didn’t have ad libitum freedom to do much; he ate what he was fed, bathed when the CNA had time and I had visiting hours-only latitude. In this case he was literally in a hospital bed for 60 days. And that’s what makes me consider the spectral nature of extended-care living.

But that’s much different than an assisted living or independent living home unless you’re at risk for emergent medical response.

Sorry to ramble, but I’ve spent the last 6 years dealing with this exact question.

I’m sure it’s not universal, but at least it’s possible. Just have to check the facility

There are several 'levels',,,,
My Husband and I are in our 70s now.
First we lived in an 'over 55 active community',,,, had dances and classes activities of all sorts and a swimming pool and a community center. They had an activity director. We owned a ground set manufactured home but leased the land. Now we are in Senior apartments,,,, it is a big apartment building with a dining room, there's a library, a theater, a lounge, a beauty shop, lots of small rooms to play games and cards. They also have an activity director here. Still ahead is assisted living (this is more the nursing home scenario) then possibly Memory care.
We're in the Metro Phoenix area with lots of old folks

on edit: The first place we could have whatever was available in our area and what we wanted to pay for. Now the Senior Apartments have Wifi and the phones can work as a hot spot if the internet is down,,,, The closest Assisted Living has Wifi,,,,, beyond that I don't know.

She has Wifi for her tablet and phone (tho she keeps losing her phone!)... and also, streaming on her TV. This is a little nursing home that I've not been well enamored over. So, I figure if they can have it, it's got to be fairly ubiquitous by now.

It's nice to see so many people caring about their loved ones' comort and so many thinking ahead about their future needs.

I'm pet sitting this week and I have a lot of free time. So I can ask questions, catch up on reading, all the stuff I put off