but the more I questioned, and the more i found out the things I had faith in weren't true, I lost faith.
I prefer not having faith. (this is about religious faith)

I remember as a young child being very concerned that my Protestant friends would go to Hell.

But a few years later I started having a lot of questions about what we were taught, and by the time I was in high school had rejected Catholicism and felt no need to join any other religion.

I call myself a nonbeliever, because for me that's the best word. I do have certain spiritual beliefs that I have no need to share with others, although if you were to visit me and take a glance at one of my bookshelves, you'd quickly figure out what it is I probably believe. I think the essential thing is that I am generally not bothered that most people don't share those beliefs, just so long as they don't belittle them or try to convert me.

I have been known to say to people (and I may even have posted such a sentiment here once or twice) that in the face of something terrible, if you have religious or spiritual beliefs, then go there.

to learn about the dominant religion in this country. I bought into the religious stuff until I was out of high school, and then rejected it completely after learning more and thinking more. I have been an atheist since 1965.

Perhaps my parents' non-believe worked against the indoctrination I got from the church they sent me to, in the end. I can't say, though. My inability to believe in supernatural entities and phenomena comes from study and knowledge of factual things.

It doesn't, my actions and meager contribution to family, friends and society are better measures of "my mark". imo

Catholic teachings. Too many things did not make sense to me. They still don't. I see religion as superstition. As in the song by Stevie Wonder:

"When you believe in things
That you don't understand,
Then you suffer,
Superstition aint the way

To me taking things on faith means you hope that they are as you believe, as there is no way to prove them. I don't take things on faith.

Some of my friends believe god controls everything going on. As if we are pawns in a game.

The question of, "why does god let bad things happen," is not part of my way of looking at events.

I think that every event has a cause. Everything that happens is caused by a previous event. It is like looking at the image you see from a mirror held up to a mirror. You see cause and event happening going back in time until you can't make it out anymore.

What is weird is my brother who grew up in the same environment as me is a Catholic Priest. (He was previously married and has kids and grand kids, he never molested any boys for the record)

I was raised in a Independent Southern Baptist family with dad a deacon & bus driver and mom a Sunday school teacher. Religion was basically my life, went to church almost all day Sunday (8:30-1 and 5:30-8; Wed. nights from 7-9 and Thurs. nights from 6-8:30. Now, I am an agnostic. I went to a Lutheran church, at my daughters' request, for a few years and they were much better than the Baptists, but their drive for money turned us off so we left there. I really don't believe in God, the Bible, Jesus - although there are many good moral admonitions in there. Because of my strict religious upbringing, i admit to a fear of hell but also realize it's not rational. I believe in a higher power that arcs towards good, but don't know that it has a name.

I can feel that

I attended 8 years of Catholic grade school, 4 years of Catholic high school, played guitar in my church's folk group for over 15 years, and continue to attend weekly mass.

I always felt lucky that the "religious" examples that I had (and continue to have) - my parents, family teachers, nuns, brothers, and priests - almost always focused on a message of love, acceptance, and service - and so that's how I try to live my life.

Thank you for posting this - wishing you well and peace!

Tim

My mother would never let us even leave the house on Sundays if we had not attended church. The only way we could miss church is if we were running a fever.

Some days ago, my brother, sister, and I buried my 93yo mother in a "celebration of life" ceremony at graveside. No damn preacher, no damn church. Her devoted neighbor wanted to say the Lord's Prayer, so we indulged her.

I am a hard-core atheist only because I can reason.

I attended this Reason Rally in DC and afterwards had a conversation with Lawrence Krauss. 😁

When I was little, my family was a "pillar" of the United Methodist church we attended. That meant I had to go to the services on Sunday, and not the "daycare" or children's church or whatever that the other kids went to, where there were puppet shows and such. I liked the music. The minister had been raised in some kind Mennonite. He was nice enough, but very boring. On the other side of the family, my grandmother didn't belong to any church--they were places where people hid their evil behind God. She watched TV ministries. Well, long about 1984 at age 11 I started watching 700 club and such with her. I thought all pop and rock music were satanic, and before I snapped out of it, I was quite a little judgmental shit about who was going to burn in hell for their evil. But then an older kid at camp told me that anyone who hadn't been born again/heard the gospel/Jesus in their hearts would burn. Even people who had been born before Jesus, or who had never even heard of him would burn. That little bit of theology was a step too far, and I began questioning everything. In junior high, my best friend was an atheist, and before I ever got out of junior high I was an atheist. I just didn't believe any of it anymore.