Well, folks, it’s that time of year again. Pumpkin spice lattes, apple picking, wool sweaters, suede boots, black cats, broomsticks, and witches! Every year there seems to be an explosion of articles on the web about witches just in time for Hallowe’en. While some of them profile actual witches, or take a look at folklore, a great many of them seem to be inspired by portrayals of witches in media. And that means telling you how to Dress Like an Actual Witch!

Like we have a dress code or something. Like there is some kind of standardized uniform we all wear. Like we all shop at the same witchy boutique at the mall (Hot Topic anyone?). Like we all have some kind of look we’re going for. Well, okay, sometimes we do. But srsly? Do we need an article to tell us how to do it?