Jesus Was Ashkenazi (JEWISH GROUP)

It's that time of the year. Thanksgiving is over, the air is colder and crisper, and lights are coming up again. Billions of people around the world are getting ready to celebrate the birth of Jesus. Except the Jews, of course. But that doesn’t mean they won’t participate in the obsession with everyone’s favorite member of the tribe. Most people forget that he was one of ours, though. And in the season of joy and celebration, the odd op-ed and the very common tweet mis-ethnicizing Jesus never, ever fails.

Jesus was not white. This statement is simple enough, and it is truthful, I suppose. (I never assumed he looked like a Renaissance painting because I have common sense, and now we have BBC’s reconstruction, which looks like he would have been profiled by airport security, for sure.)

But once you give an inch… Now, absolutely everyone wants to claim the lord and savior as theirs. I mean, we’re all obsessed with “representation,” and the son of God is the ultimate cop. Jesus has been Black. He has been Asian. He has been Irish. Jesus has even transcended the racial debate and has been gendered as non-binary. OH, and lest I forget, Jesus has of course been Palestinian. A Palestinian Brown Jew, nonetheless. Might as well have been a sphinx.

So here’s where the Jews come in. We–and this is a loose ‘we’ thankfully–have resorted to defending ourselves against misinformation and erasure by stating the obvious. Jesus could not have been Palestinian because Palestine did not exist in his lifetime. He was born in the Kingdom of Judea, and the term “Palestine” wasn’t used until more than a century after his death. And I hope I don’t have to explain why he wasn’t Black or Asian because I won’t. Jesus was a Jew. He was Judean, if you will. Fine.

https://jewcy.com/religion-and-beliefs/jesus-was-ashkenazi

For the humor impaired, he's writing this tongue and cheek.