while holding packages in my other two arms.

Centipedes get a hundred useful appendages while I get only 2 (4 if ya count my. feet). Da fuck?

And worse, I was wearing sunglasses that I could not take off without putting down the groceries. With the sunglasses on, I couldn't really see the key hole and ended up dropping the keys. My daughter laughed and laughed as I cursed. Her hands were full too, so I couldn't blame her.

Also, we should have kept our tails and fur.

It protected some individuals from anemia when humans moved from hunter/gatherer culture to farming. Now however since everything has iron added to it (especially cereal) it becomes a problem leading to damage to various organs and is rarely tested for. Fairly common in Irish/Scottish and northern European descendants.

or appendices?

Who would have designed a structure that had the playground located with the bathroom?

That's my favorite interpretation of all the various deities and myths - a cosmic sense of humor.

It aims for survival.

... and was so hungover the next morning he couldn't get any work done and had to rest.

Modeling one's god after a misogynistic homophobic authoritarian anti-intellectual mean-drunk father was always a bad idea.

The only way to sustain such a religion is to hammer a child's natural curiosity out of them and raise them in ignorance.

Even then, some of them will rebel.