Atheists & Agnostics
Related: About this forumHas anyone heard from Evoman?
I fear he's lost his battle.
For context:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/123028049
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)He still has lots of terrible, painful, awful days of sickness. But he was able to take a trip to Vancouver recently and is still getting chemo, with a break from it now and again.
Heddi
(18,312 posts)EvolveOrConvolve
(6,452 posts)Tell him his DU A&A peeps are praying for him.
kdmorris
(5,649 posts)so... yeah, we can do that!
progressoid
(50,747 posts)let him know we're praying for him.
Seriously though, we are thinking about him. Hope he gets better.
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)Tell Evoman we love him.
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)I'm sure he'll also appreciate your prayers to The Almighty Loving God.
Evoman
(8,040 posts)In order to lose a battle, someone has to win. And cancer dies as soon as I do so it can't win.
Besides, that's such a cliche. People don't lose their battle against diabetes or heart disease. .. They die from it. This whole battle talk makes it seem like we cancer patients can use willpower to beat cancer, and implies the ones who don't are losers. That's too much pressure!
Anyways guys, I'm still alive and kicking. My last CT scan showed everything was stable. The cancer isn't shrinking, but it isn't growing or spreading either so I still have a little time left. I'm already past my expiration date but I will hopefully get a little warning before things fall of the track. What we suspect will happen is that eventually some portion of the cancer will become resistant and then, if some last ditch chemo or trial doesn't stop it, I'll have about a 6 month count down.
Right now, I'm just looking to enjoy the summer. My 36th birthday is in June and making it until then is my next goal. I'm hoping I'll be strong enough to do some traveling. Other than that, I spend most of my days just relaxing, playing video games, and writing poetry. My poetry has been well received by my palliative care nursing staff and has apparently been read and dessiminated among the nursing staff and patients in the cancer, palliative care and hospice ward. Right now I'm working on putting together a book of my best poems. ..it Is my "legacy" so to speak.
Anyhow hang tight guys. I always mean to stop by more often to keep you guys from worrying so much by I'm extremely distracted constantly. I think that has a lot to do with the chemo. I promise I'll give a better update in the next couple of weeks. I'm on my phone and its hard to write long posts on this thing.
Evoman
P.S. I'm still looking super forward to the game star citizen and squadran 42 coming out, so if any of you are into it, I plan on starting a squad of killer peacekeepers.
LiberalAndProud
(12,799 posts)Are you taking advance orders for your book?
Evoman
(8,040 posts)I'm still writing and I'm not sure if my poems are God enough to publish. I've got some editor friends critiquing them, mostly for feedback I can use to improve, but one of them hinted that I could get it published and maybe even sell, considering the demographic I wrote for: anger and frustration of cancer, chemo, and being abandoned could sell or be donated as e resource for cancer centers. I'm not interested in making money though it would be nice to leave something begins for my wife. I just want people to, in this world constantly being told to be positive, know that is okay to be angry, and be scared, and be pessimistic and even feel hate. That's what I want to teach. .. That's what I want add my legacy. .I want people to not be victims of the tyranny of positivity
beam me up scottie
(57,349 posts)Don't feel like you have to stop by often, just if you get the chance, no guilt, no promises necessary.
I too would love a copy of your book.
Enjoy your summer!
onager
(9,356 posts)And thanks for checking in.
Your "cliche" remarks reminded me of Barbara Ehrenreich's epic rants about her breast cancer.
She admits to being an atheist, but also admits she prayed for a swift death by shark bite, sniper, or madman with an ax - death by ANYTHING but the "sickly-sweet sentimentality" of those teddy bears wearing pink ribbons...
Her 2001 article "Welcome to Cancerland:"
http://barbaraehrenreich.com/website/cancerland.htm
nil desperandum
(654 posts)I am a lurker who posts quite infrequently, I do agree with your comment about battling cancer...
For me it was just shit luck...doctor found some in a routine exam, was early and so far I remain without any cancer...if I had postponed that exam a year I'd be dead now....that's luck and not a battle in any way.
I wish you the best of that luck and hope you are able to remain for decades past your expiration date.
A squad of killer peacekeepers sounds like quite a good time to me.
trotsky
(49,533 posts)Glad you posted, and happy to hear you are in a stable situation. Remember, every day you have is yours to decide what to do with. Although if you decided to also put out a book of your plays, I wouldn't mind. I just gotta know how blotsky's character plays out!
Evoman
(8,040 posts)Basically, I'm not sure if I have the concentration or capacity to write even a crappy play, but what I can do is write a poem about the people here and include Blotsky. First I have to find something that ŕhymes with "drinking corona sraight from the horses penis".
Anyhow I'll get to it if I ever have the energy. Unless I'm in the zone, which chemo brain prevents constantly. I will try. .I will try to give him a future, Trots.
trotsky
(49,533 posts)Take care of yourself first and foremost. You are missed here on DU though.
Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)It is good to hear that things are stable, but that isn't the best news to get. Better than it could be though.
Do stop in occasionally to let us know how you are......but don't come here often enough to waste the time you have. Enjoy life to the fullest.
Evoman
(8,040 posts)Have introduced me to people, I've even met in r real life and who I even invited to my wedding. I would love of some of you would be my Facebook friends. Name is Daniel, my handle is Evoman360, and I have a pretty weird avatar. I love to have anyone on here in my Facebook page. Look me up.
kdmorris
(5,649 posts)You are right that they never say that those of us with Diabetes lost our battle with it. Some days, it still feels like a battle, though!
I tend to play MMORPG, though I have no time to play games these days.
Enjoy every day to it's fullest.
deucemagnet
(4,549 posts)I've always enjoyed your posts, and you're always in this atheist's thoughts, if not his prayers.
EvolveOrConvolve
(6,452 posts)We're such a small community here, every loss is huge.