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Cartoonist

(7,533 posts)
Mon Apr 27, 2015, 04:36 PM Apr 2015

My Prayer For Nepal

Some people think that praying yields results, so here goes:

Dear God Almighty, creator of Earth in 7 days.
The plate tectonics you devised worked perfectly.
You managed to kill 2,000 people this time.
I pray you don't kill any more.
I pray the ones you only injured get better.
I pray next time that you give us a little warning.
Oh, and was this because of that gay thing or that abortion thing?
Are we praying to the right God?
Can you come down and clear that up for us?
There are so many to chose from, it's hard to tell.


18 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
My Prayer For Nepal (Original Post) Cartoonist Apr 2015 OP
Try cross-posting that in the prayer circle. bvf Apr 2015 #1
oh yeah. That'll go over well Heddi Apr 2015 #7
It would be worth the hide, bvf Apr 2015 #11
Victim blaming. beam me up scottie Apr 2015 #2
I'll pray for you, bmus. n/t. bvf Apr 2015 #3
Could you send over a therapist too? beam me up scottie Apr 2015 #4
No, because that would actually require effort. bvf Apr 2015 #5
It'll be twice as effective because you announced it on teh interweb! beam me up scottie Apr 2015 #6
Bonus! bvf Apr 2015 #10
It's all our fault for pointing out that prayer is stupid. AtheistCrusader Apr 2015 #8
Yes, it is extremely awful of us to just take people's security blankets away from them. trotsky Apr 2015 #12
Let me see if I have this right...the bad people were smote, smitted, smitten? PassingFair Apr 2015 #9
Well nil desperandum Apr 2015 #13
How can I tell which god sent the earthquake? PassingFair Apr 2015 #14
mine too nil desperandum Apr 2015 #15
Uh, guys, aren't you forgetting someone? Arugula Latte Apr 2015 #16
Yeah. That's one of the first things I had a problem with bvf Apr 2015 #17
Well, ya know, back when Yahweh was knee-high to a grasshopper, Arugula Latte Apr 2015 #18

beam me up scottie

(57,349 posts)
2. Victim blaming.
Mon Apr 27, 2015, 04:46 PM
Apr 2015

Stop picking on God, he can't help it if he's a psychotic mass murderer! He's just acting out because he was traumatized as a child.


beam me up scottie

(57,349 posts)
4. Could you send over a therapist too?
Mon Apr 27, 2015, 04:52 PM
Apr 2015

I obviously need counseling for my anger issues.

Just don't send me God's, I don't see any improvement in his behaviour.

 

bvf

(6,604 posts)
5. No, because that would actually require effort.
Mon Apr 27, 2015, 05:04 PM
Apr 2015

I feel I'm doing enough by closing my eyes, bowing my head, and muttering a few words of comfort.

Hope that helps!


AtheistCrusader

(33,982 posts)
8. It's all our fault for pointing out that prayer is stupid.
Mon Apr 27, 2015, 05:24 PM
Apr 2015

I bet you tell 3 year olds that santa isn't real, too. Then kick sand in their faces.

trotsky

(49,533 posts)
12. Yes, it is extremely awful of us to just take people's security blankets away from them.
Tue Apr 28, 2015, 09:27 AM
Apr 2015

Far better to condescend and treat them like children who are incapable of functioning otherwise. THAT'S the more respectful thing to do.



I will never understand that.

PassingFair

(22,437 posts)
9. Let me see if I have this right...the bad people were smote, smitted, smitten?
Mon Apr 27, 2015, 05:58 PM
Apr 2015

But some will be blessed and have miraculous rescues?
Or is God killing the good people so they can live with him in the sky?

I get so confused.



nil desperandum

(654 posts)
13. Well
Tue Apr 28, 2015, 11:54 AM
Apr 2015

in Nepal they are buddhists so the christian god might assume they are worshipping false idols and thus are all bad people...

It really depends on which god sent the earthquake I believe.

That doesn't help much I know, but I do find christians praying for infidels to recover and find the christian god quite confusing myself.

 

Arugula Latte

(50,566 posts)
16. Uh, guys, aren't you forgetting someone?
Tue Apr 28, 2015, 04:15 PM
Apr 2015


I mean, sure, God is Omnipotent and didn't have to create Satan in the first place and also should be able to kick Satan's ass at any time, being Omnipotent and all, but if we have learned one thing, it is this:

God.Is.Never.To.Blame.For.Anything.
But.Please.Praise.Him.For.All.Good.Things.

Amen
 

bvf

(6,604 posts)
17. Yeah. That's one of the first things I had a problem with
Tue Apr 28, 2015, 06:47 PM
Apr 2015

growing up catholic.

Who in his/her right mind actually creates an enemy?

God is seriously in need of a therapist, or at least a stay at Charenton.

 

Arugula Latte

(50,566 posts)
18. Well, ya know, back when Yahweh was knee-high to a grasshopper,
Tue Apr 28, 2015, 06:53 PM
Apr 2015

there wasn't much known about bipolar disorder ...

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