Two years ago tonight

was the last peaceful night, the last night I slept through til dawn next to my dear George.

The morning of the 20th was the beginning of the end of our life together. Never again could I reach for him with the sleepy comfort of a warm hug. Although he returned to our home for two months over the next year, his specialized bed was in the living room.
Never again did he enter the room we shared for so many years.

He made trips only to dialysis, and two trips to Dr offices, and one wheelchair ride for a block around our neighborhood. He was wheeled into the dining room maybe three times, and into the kitchen once. There was no way to bring him into the back yard to read his paper and watch the birds he loved to see at the feeder.

This anniversary snuck up on me. I wasn't expecting such raw sorrow. I miss him so much.