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Mika

(17,751 posts)
Mon Apr 1, 2013, 06:47 PM Apr 2013

I am in shock. Just learned that my closest friend committed suicide.

My mind is frozen in a short loop ... "why".
Trying to recover a bit before I make the drive home.
I've dealt with the death of loved ones, but this one has me disoriented and spinning.
Can't talk w/o breaking down. Can only type.
Shit. Why?

11 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
I am in shock. Just learned that my closest friend committed suicide. (Original Post) Mika Apr 2013 OP
Oh Mika, I'm so sorry. polly7 Apr 2013 #1
I'm sorry A Little Weird Apr 2013 #2
Vibes to you and her family. applegrove Apr 2013 #3
So sorry Mika, cry all you need to... auntAgonist Apr 2013 #4
I am so sorry. ellie Apr 2013 #5
Mika....I am so sorry livetohike Apr 2013 #6
Thanks to all here. Very much appreciated. Mika Apr 2013 #7
I tried to put my thoughts into words here and I fail miserably ... auntAgonist Apr 2013 #8
Hi Mika ellie Apr 2013 #9
Thanks, ellie. Mika Apr 2013 #10
Very sorry for your loss. 47of74 Apr 2013 #11

polly7

(20,582 posts)
1. Oh Mika, I'm so sorry.
Mon Apr 1, 2013, 07:07 PM
Apr 2013

I really have no words ... I found my Dad, I wasn't able to comprehend anything for days. Make sure you have people around you right now. So, so sorry.

livetohike

(23,001 posts)
6. Mika....I am so sorry
Thu Apr 4, 2013, 01:54 PM
Apr 2013
Please post more when you are ready to talk. My sympathy to you and all who knew your friend.
 

Mika

(17,751 posts)
7. Thanks to all here. Very much appreciated.
Thu Apr 4, 2013, 02:20 PM
Apr 2013

My dear and sweet friend and brother Mike was on a downward spiral since the crash. Was in construction. Lost it all. Biz, house, all of it. After his divorce 4 years ago he travelled hi and low, relocating from state to state wherever there was some promise. Only to have it fall apart in layoffs and austerity. Hard not to be depressed after such and so many changes for the worse. Went from a middle class homeowner w/a family, to a day laborer. Seeing it all around you. Alone. Living in shit shacks. Constant exhaustion and worry. Depression. He would not accept help from his friends, and could not get help elsewhere. We all tried. It was not enough. He had had enough, saw no point to it. Swallowed some pills with cheap booze. Went to sleep.
I'm still experiencing some cognitive dissonance. Hard to believe that I'll never speak to or hear or see this sweet soul again.

Thanks again, to all.



auntAgonist

(17,257 posts)
8. I tried to put my thoughts into words here and I fail miserably ...
Fri Apr 5, 2013, 10:09 AM
Apr 2013

Just know that I care.



aA
kesha

 

Mika

(17,751 posts)
10. Thanks, ellie.
Thu Apr 11, 2013, 04:09 PM
Apr 2013

Still get teary eyed when I talk or think too much about it.
Kind of angry about it right now. Angry about a wide spectrum of things that had happened to my dear friend that drove him over the edge. The horrors. The tragedy.
Nothing I can do about him now. It'll take a while to be able to smile and laugh at and cherish the usual memories of good times, but, it'll come.

Thanks for asking.


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