History of Feminism
Related: About this forumWill the awful power of the word 'slut' defeat feminists' efforts to reclaim it?
Like cunt and bitch, many feminists have long tried to wrest away from its original users the power and harm of the word slut and to give it new meaning. Increasingly, though, its seeming like we might not succeed any time soon.
Take Leora Tanenbaum: in 2000, she wrote Slut!: Growing up Female with a Bad Reputation chronicling girls and womens experiences with the word. She herself was called a slut as a high school student in the 1980s long before the term sexual harassment was coined and told me I had no vocabulary to understand what happened.
Now, 15 years later, Tanenbaum is about to publish another book: I Am Not a Slut because, in part, the sheen of reclaiming slut seems to have worn off over the years. When she spoke to women who called themselves sluts with a positive and defiant spirit, all told her the decision had turned against them later and all regretted it.
http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/jan/20/word-slut-feminists-efforts-reclaim-it
Tuesday Afternoon
(56,912 posts)this was years ago. a life time ago.
shows how clueless I was (or maybe, how empowered I was)
She told me:
To guys, all women are either Bitches or Sluts.
I was like -what- ? stunned for a moment.
Had no clue it was such a binary option
but, immediately I knew.
I will take Bitch because Fuck That Noise.
She chose Slut because she wanted to be known as the Nice One.
If that is what it means to be nice I wanted no part of it.
I fully support any woman who wants to be or even be known as a Slut.
but. I demand. That these women, in return,
fully support my right to be known as a Bitch.
What I really hope is that we (men, are you listening?)
can evolve past such binary classification of Human Beings.
ismnotwasm
(42,486 posts)One of my co-workers--a guy, was telling a woman who was going on a date with a new guy that "women have all the power in these situations"
I asked him, what if she was going to meet another woman? What if it was a guy on a first date with a guy? Fortunately it wasn't hard to get him out of his heterosexist binary type thinking; he was really talking about himself, and how he felt on first dates.
OT, but I also did an informal poll of the straight single women and thoughts on "nice guys" or "nerdy guys" it was mixed race and ages, about 10 women. They ALL said they'd go for the nerdy nice guy over some "bad boy" asshole. One medical student pointed out that I was asking women who had a better education than some, which is true. But my next project is to go ask a bunch of recovering Addicts what their preference in men would be. (Tattoo lover is probably going to be on the list) I'll bet you money they all say 'nice guys'. Theyre sick of assholes.
Tuesday Afternoon
(56,912 posts)will be interested in your poll results. do post them, please
Response to Tuesday Afternoon (Reply #1)
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seabeyond
(110,159 posts)the mere fact there is a word that define womens sexuality alone is the reason it can never be reclaimed, or whatever others want to say. since it is the very basic issue of the word, it is there we need to have the conversation. not if we can own a word or not.
ismnotwasm
(42,486 posts)I support all feminist efforts--I get it. Remember all the arguments over "Pussy Riot" and "FEMEN"? What happened to them is about what I figured would happen.
Now it's like where are they now?
There's currently a nudist campaign to fight revenge porn, a push for legal toplessness for women--more attempts for women to own their sexuality, and in slow increments believe we are, But we're not doing it by calling ourselves and each other sluts and bitches, calling prostitution and stripping feminist professions. Loudly proclaiming how much we love porn (porn is in a sorry state right now)
We're doing it by getting educated, finding ourselves a minority gender in so many jobs taking sexist shit, and speaking up about it. Writing books about it. Blogging about it. Fighting rape culture. Finding allies. We are doing it by making sure we are inclusive, not exclusive. We are doing it by tellng patriatical standards to go fuck themselves.
And we still have to battle for reproductive rights in the middle of all this.
seabeyond
(110,159 posts)our young girls voices. i am telling you. i have a 22 yr old and 26 yr old niece, flat in the middle of this shit. for a couple years, i have been hearing them process this world that is being created for them. they do not like it.
and that, will end it there.
none of the whining and nashing of the teeth is going to get these girls ot become what our society is trying to create them as. our girls are too aware, smart, independent, confident.
Response to ismnotwasm (Reply #4)
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arcane1
(38,613 posts)Back for more!
ismnotwasm
(42,486 posts)He's such a moron he fell for it
arcane1
(38,613 posts)ismnotwasm
(42,486 posts)MadrasT
(7,237 posts)Actually there is something I do about it all the time.
Refuse to give a fuck.
Go ahead, judge away.
I. Give. Not. One. Shit. What. You. Think.
AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)On Tue Jan 20, 2015, 02:08 PM an alert was sent on the following post:
Telling patriarchal standards to fuck themselves will only achieve a smack in the mouth
http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1255&pid=54043
REASON FOR ALERT
This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.
ALERTER'S COMMENTS
Returning misogynist.
JURY RESULTS
You served on a randomly-selected Jury of DU members which reviewed this post. The review was completed at Tue Jan 20, 2015, 02:18 PM, and the Jury voted 6-1 to HIDE IT.
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Explanation: No explanation given
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Juror #3 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: Wow, he came out swinging with this one didn't he? I think it's time for this misogynist to turn in his membership card too.
Juror #4 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: Get the fuck out.
Juror #5 voted to HIDE IT
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Juror #6 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: Why hasn't MIRT taken this one out yet?
Juror #7 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: It's an opinion. Everyone's entitled to an opinion. We do not judge them. That's what the Ignore button is for.
Thank you very much for participating in our Jury system, and we hope you will be able to participate again in the future.
Tuesday Afternoon
(56,912 posts)Ignore is a form of judgement, is it not?
arcane1
(38,613 posts)AtheistCrusader
(33,982 posts)arcane1
(38,613 posts)I was the alerter so I know I'm innocent
Response to ismnotwasm (Reply #4)
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Sheldon Cooper
(3,724 posts)The only one I can think of (off the top of my head) is maybe 'queer'. Some AA people tried with the n-word, but I don't think that's been successful.
Of all the other gender/race insults, I can't think of any others.
Tuesday Afternoon
(56,912 posts)the word queer ...
the -n- word I hear on a daily basis as I work with blacks who use it in their conversations with each other.
Sheldon Cooper
(3,724 posts)I thought it was fairly common for gay men to refer to themselves that way. But of course I could be wrong and my apologies if I've offended anyone.
As far as the n-word, I am not AA so I can't say if they feel that it's been reclaimed. I do know there was concern in that community about attempts to reclaim the word.
Tuesday Afternoon
(56,912 posts)I understand the Banner Slogan Queer and maybe that is sufficient to call reclaim
I do work with Gay men and women.
Maybe, I will ask them what they think and see what they have to say about Gay/Queer.
Seems that I hear them use the word Gay not Queer in their everyday vernacular.
F4lconF16
(3,747 posts)But I see a lot with the word queer as well. Idk, I've noticed more people use the word gay as a pejorative than I have queer. Maybe it's just my age group and experiences, but nobody uses that word for pretty much anything except in protests/marches.
Response to Tuesday Afternoon (Reply #5)
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Tuesday Afternoon
(56,912 posts)ismnotwasm
(42,486 posts)He cracks me up
Manifestor_of_Light
(21,046 posts)And somebody will call you a slut. Just because it's a convenient label with no definition.
Response to Manifestor_of_Light (Reply #27)
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