I have always wanted to cook thanksgiving dinner and have lots of people enjoy my food and be happy.

The only person who invited me to her dinner to bring food does not have a usable kitchen (filthy, grime, clutter, non-workable oven) and I would have to drive 150 miles with food in coolers. It's not workable. She doesn't even have a clean table to sit at.

My husband and I have invited a few people in our town over before for Thanksgiving and can't get anybody to show up.

So I've given up on my dream. I cooked thanksgiving dinner all day in 2011, at a relative's house, sitting on a stool because I was out of breath and panting violently. That evening I was having a crisis and had to go to the ER where I was in ICU for eight days with pulmonary emboli (blood clots in my lungs that were life threatening). And nobody I cooked for ever said thank you! In fact, since then, the stepson (whose house I was in) has informed me via e-mail that he hates me and wishes that I had died that night. What a sweetie!! No more contact with him or his hateful girlfriend. I have done nothing to them.

I've separated Christmas and commerce a long time ago. Husband and I love to decorate but I have nobody to see them.

Did you do your baking this year?

I'm going to a potluck of about 250 people for thanksgiving. I want to bring something really traditional, maybe dressing and gravy.

So sorry about your 2011 experience.

Some towns have Thanksgiving for the homeless or those who are shut-ins. Does your town have anything like that?

And iced them and put them in individual baggies and passed them out. Apparently word has gotten around town from previous years that they are good.
So few people hand out candy or decorate here that the people really appreciate people who do decorate and pass out candy. The churches have taken over Halloween and restricted the costumes kids can wear and such.

They don't have anything as far as social services in this town except for the senior citizens center. My father founded it as a 501 (c)(3) non-profit, back in the late 1980s, and since he died in 2000 it has gone downhill steadily, because there is no one smart enough to run it properly. They used to serve low-cost government surplus food lunches but that has not been done in years. He raised money, got a matching grant and made sure the company that built the building were bonded and insured, so some thief wouldn't take all the money.

Because of the huge amounts of poverty and lack of jobs in rural America, we have lots of con artists, beggars and hustlers and people with rap sheets.

thank you for your kind words.

My kid is busy with her life and hubby's kids are estranged from him, to put it mildly. He said that the older son wishing I had died that night was the worst thing anyone had said to him in his life. I've made it nearly sixty years now without a death threat, but not now.

They're in another state and we're ignoring them. Younger son is in bad situations but not as hateful. We have nothing in common with him to talk about since he thinks all musicians that are baby boomers are ancient and he has nothing to learn from us.

come to trick or treat and I miss it.

Good for you father for starting this center, but sorry that it has deteriorated so much. I hope that perhaps you and others in the community can revitalize it.

Your family troubles are far from unusual, but the wish for you to die really goes over the top. We are fortunate to have 4 between us and have good relationships with all of them. But we are very far away and don't see them enough.

Are you doing anything with your music these day?

I buy nothing, absolutely nothing.

Except some lights with which I decorate the outside of my boat in a manner that would remind one of a double wide.

whether the recipients are celebrating Hannukah, Kwanzaa, Yule, Solstice, Christmas, someone's birthday, or a random Wednesday. (One of the great things about being pagan is that you can enjoy everyone else's festivals along with your own. December turns into one long party.)

Between Black Friday and the second week of January, I buy nothing but groceries, meds and other absolute necessities in person. Anything else I need or want comes off the intertubes.

If I tried to make gifts, well all I can say is much hilarity would ensue.

One of the reasons I gave up holiday gifts is because I despise shopping, except for food. But the main reason is because it felt so forced and artificial.

Now I collect things in the places I am living. I brought back dish towels from a weaver I found in italy and gave them away every time I visited people while I was in the states. I also brought back lavender from my yard, small tins of amazing olive oil and nuts.

In Mexico I have collected and distributed these wonderful dresses that can be worn over a bathing suit of with leggings.

Anyway, I just don't do the holidays at all.

because I hate to shop. Exceptions are book stores, art supply stores, and pet stores, from which I usually emerge with a couple bags of crinkly mylar balls, catnip mice, and feather boas on sticks.

Since most of my friends love to cook, I'm making a bunch of pie pans and apple bakers (small bowls with a little spike in the middle.). They're fun and very easy to make.

think I've bought a real book for years. Food markets are my passion - particularly big ones with lots of goodies and fresh produce.

Great idea to make pie pans and apple bakers. Wish I could be on the receiving end of one of those. Cooking and learning spanish are my passions these days. I hope to pick the clarinet back up, but I got so frustrated I haven't touched it in a year.

Enjoy yourself!

Message:You are what you consume. That's a different flavor of demeaning sexism than I have heard before but I am not surprised by it.
I got sexist crap from my mother and grandmother, not from my dad or granddad.

Your apple things sound fun.

My mother was a feminist to the bone. That's bow Traditional Cherokee women are raised.

The apple bakers are fun to make. You open your clay off-center, and that makes the litle spike automatically.

I used to love to watch her show. She shows people how to make something simple, and helps them feel creative. I think that's a valuable service for people who want to be creative but don't know how.

There are plenty of craft mags out there with easy things to make in them. Right now I'm trying to get my knitting back into a good tension since I have not done it in decades. Still remember how.

Your idea of collecting things from other countries and bringing them back to the U.S. is a good idea.

My daughter has a boyfriend born in the US but his parents are from India. They flew to Bombay in the spring and brought me back a purse. Actually it's pretty huge, more of an overnight bag. She said "We knew you'd like it".
It is totally colorful and outrageous. It has embroidery, mirrors, tassels, fake coins, all kinds of stuff on it and has a riot of color. I feel like I'm reliving the psychedelic days of my childhood in 67-68 when I discovered for art class that day-glo paint was the greatest invention of the 20th century and the Fillmore Poster was the coolest art I'd ever seen. Psychedelic posters for the Fillmore ballrooms came out of Art Nouveau, which I love.

I believe in wearing a wild article of clothing or a purse to express your personality, but I can't handle people with tons of tattoos and lots of holes in their bodies. That's too much visual stimulation for me to deal with.

I have bought her books in the past, but nothing I make even resembles hers.

I am heavily "left brained". I am really, really good at puzzles.

My one area of creativity is in the kitchen. I am finally finding an outlet for what little smidgen of creativity I have.

The purse sounds absolutely wonderful and I am glad that it speaks to you.

I wear some odd clothing myself and always have. I don't do tattoos and piercings either and I don't even like jewelry. But I love wearing something unique.

So I guess we all find our outlets somewhere.

I have made handpainted xmas cards in the past. You can buy heavy watercolor paper and envelopes in a box at an art supply store.
I've also cooked fudge, bought tins at the dollar store, and mailed it to people across the country. The postage was considerable but it was worth it. People love it because I don't know anyone else but me that makes handmade things for xmas presents. I'm sure other people do it.

Local business you can support:

www.eilenbergerbakery.com

Their fruitcakes are better than the Deluxe fruitcakes made in Corsicana. The pecan cakes are good for those of us who don't dig candied fruit; they have a lot more nut and a lot less candied fruit. This also comes in chocolate nut cake.

My family believed that 'Christmas is for children'-- the gift-giving part-- and that it should have a deeper, more personal meaning for adults. We always had a large Christmas Eve dinner for family and close friends, but monetarily, we made gifts to charities-- usually our local food pantry or similar organization.

My family were not 'Scrooges', by any means, but held the firm belief that commercialization denigrated the true meaning of Christmas.