Elder-caregivers

Beatlelvr

(675 posts) Sun Jan 8, 2023, 12:12 PM Jan 2023

We are moving mom to a care facility

On Thursday. Been bedridden since June after getting covid. We've had full time care giving in the home at $12,000/ month.
She wants to get out of bed, and who can blame her. But caregiver and I can't manage it. A family friend owns a facility and a room came up. At only $6000/month, we grabbed it. Told caregiver yesterday which broke my heart; she's almost family at this point.
Mom doesn't know yet, and that's another challenge.
Thank goodness I recorded It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World yesterday on our local pbs station. It's giving me some comic relief between all the crying.

7 replies

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We are moving mom to a care facility (Original Post) Beatlelvr Jan 2023 OP

You have my sympathy, and good luck. Walleye Jan 2023 #1

This is so tough cyclonefence Jan 2023 #2

I'm a senior move manager and that's the hardest thing to do kimbutgar Jan 2023 #3

Yes Beatlelvr Jan 2023 #4

If at all possible, have the current caregiver come to visit, spend a little time with Mom No Vested Interest Jan 2023 #5

How did the transition go for your mom, Beatlelvr? JudyM Jan 2023 #6

Well I'm a month late to this post leighbythesea2 Feb 2023 #7

Walleye

(35,658 posts)

1. You have my sympathy, and good luck.

Reply to Beatlelvr (Original post)

Sun Jan 8, 2023, 12:16 PM

Jan 2023

cyclonefence

(4,873 posts)

2. This is so tough

Reply to Beatlelvr (Original post)

Sun Jan 8, 2023, 12:18 PM

Jan 2023

Hugs to all of you.

kimbutgar

(23,254 posts)

3. I'm a senior move manager and that's the hardest thing to do

Reply to Beatlelvr (Original post)

Sun Jan 8, 2023, 12:26 PM

Jan 2023

Especially when they get non mobile and it’s hard on all of you. Make sure you include mom in picking out some of her favorite things to take with her. Also take some photo albums.

I also got watched it’s a mad mad mad world yesterday and forgot how funny it was!

Good luck.

Beatlelvr

(675 posts)

4. Yes

Reply to Beatlelvr (Original post)

Sun Jan 8, 2023, 12:38 PM

Jan 2023

Thank you so much for the advice.

No Vested Interest

(5,196 posts)

5. If at all possible, have the current caregiver come to visit, spend a little time with Mom

Reply to Beatlelvr (Original post)

Mon Jan 9, 2023, 02:47 AM

Jan 2023

in new facility.
It will be a comfort for Mom, and caregiver can ease the transition by letting new facility team know Mom's preferences, etc.
Caregiver can also clue you and family in to any problems, and there likely will be some.

I have a family member in long-term care and pay to have a previous caregiver come twice a week for a few hours to occupy her time with games and take her out to dr. appointments and change of scenery or a snack. (My family member is much younger.)

JudyM

(29,517 posts)

6. How did the transition go for your mom, Beatlelvr?

Reply to Beatlelvr (Original post)

Thu Jan 26, 2023, 01:18 AM

Jan 2023

leighbythesea2

(1,216 posts)

7. Well I'm a month late to this post

Reply to Beatlelvr (Original post)

Thu Feb 9, 2023, 05:51 PM

Feb 2023

Because am a caregiver too & im getting turned into a fine dust with it at the moment. Honestly no time to do anything, including be on DU.

I’m so sorry to hear of your situation. It is for the best, it sounds like— and that monthly price is not too bad.
But I feel for you on the pain it is causing you emotionally. It’s like a caregiver cannot win, in ways. I dread that day, but mine is coming. We’re spending 14k a month last 2 months. Am waiting on some testing etc for a specific issue mom is having.
I’m sure you’ve read up on caregiving, there’s your health and well being too. It sounds like the care has been very intense. I hope the transition has been ok?

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