playing w my brain. mmj

Last edited Fri Jun 14, 2019, 10:30 AM - Edit history (1)

so, i have been struggling w fibro and arthritis for a couple decades now.
i have managed to keep going, but meds have outlived their usefulness in the face of the spread of the pain.
i turn 65 in a few weeks.
it was either opioids or weed, and having been a smoker most of my life, guess which one i picked?

fibro tends to cause paradoxical pain response, as it has for me, so i started out w some abnormal reactions.
edibles dont usually work for me, my lungs are old, there are lots of complications.

i also needed more than pain relief. i keep saying i need puppy uppers and doggie downers, and if you are old enough to get that joke, you know just what i mean. but yeah, millennials.

so, i have tried about a dozen strains of oil and about that many of edibles, and i am starting to find some useful strains.
but the trial and error has been interesting and fun.
i have come to think of it as playing w my brain.

i knew that one thing that mj did for me was it changed the way i interacted and took care of my animals. puts me in my happy place. activating this lightens my load, and adds to my joy.
i figure anything that does this is good, and might have some other good affects.
this has proven mostly true.

but some of the other things that have popped up have been very amusing.
a good sativa gummy at bedtime doesnt register a conscious reaction, but it does lead to nice sleep. fun dreams, as opposed to my usual nightmares. at least a short memory on awakening. wake up pretty rested.
this is great, because it is a signal that i should have a good day, fatigue wise. that turns out to be very useful.
some strains poke my creativity, and spark solutions to the many little problems that litter my landscape.
this is very useful, but sometimes leads me to wander off into space when i am trying to get things done.
some give me energy, but it is a jittery sort that isnt really useful, all tolled.

but i just found a super good strain this week.
energy w/o the jitters that some other strains brought, and totally poking me in my language centers.
yes, this strain sparks words.
i am not making any judgements about the quality of recent posts here and elsewhere, but they have been well above average in volume.
the big thing is, tho, i am not searching for words, not fumbling for spellings, not tripping the correct as much. no big, headbanging senior moments.
my typing is more automatic and fluid. fewer typos.
much more fluid.

it is also totally tickling my funny bone.
i almost never actually lol, but this week i am at least chuckling
it is just the time of year where i run into my neighbors a lot, and talk a lot. but i swear these conversations are at least a little funnier than usual. (i am pretty funny. i'm not sayin, i'm just sayin.)
it tastes pretty good, too. easy on my lungs to vape.

this is so great.
i was so worried that i might lose my language/writing skills. i have been struggling w so much fatigue, so much brain fog, that i was really starting to have a lot of searching for simple words, and other tripping around. daily brain farts.

i enjoy writing. i sing my irish ancestor's song. i am a former gifted kid in language.
it is also likely to be my last salable skill. i am comfortable, but i would rather be a little more bullet resistant.
i did most of the writing for my sister's campaign, and she did win. i mean.

it has long been my plan when the rocking chair gets me to set down my story(ies), at least for my kids. heck, i come from a big, big family. if i wrote it for fun, i would need at least 100 copies. it would entertain me for a while.
i could comb through my farm page for a book. people do like my farm story. i have gotten some good media. i mean...
a book tour would be a blast, and likely my last chance to do any real traveling.
i give pretty good speech.
i have been making a conscious effort to maintain these skills, and i am so happy to find a way to stimulate them.

this is just so much fun. i feel like this is a game of operation. only it's a brain, and i get to take this little probe and poke this spot and that.
i have a long time interest in how brains work, and how fun is it to play around w my own?
i wonder if any of you have good stories about pot and your head.



eta- the strain is pie hole.