Untangling myself from the octopus that is my cable, internet and phone provider... [View all]

This is the year I unplug. Every year for the last several years I have been promising myself this is the year when I get out of the unhealthy relationship I have with my cable, internet and phone service provider. A competing internet provider, Sling TV, YouTubeTV and Ooma have all been singing their sweet Siren's song to me for a while now. Faster download speeds, no data caps, more content, more sports, no junk fees. Somewhere in the most primitive part of my brain, my brainstem veritably tingled at the thought of it all.

Last year, instead of ditching my cable and internet provider, I actually got roped into an additional service - mobile. It was like I was powerless to the allure of that new cell phone that retailed for $1200 and the accompanying $450 smart watch but that I would be getting for only $400 and $150 respectively (but only because I was getting roped into a two year contract with credits towards the phone and watch spread out over the two years). Son of a bitch. I called up my provider ready to say "Look, it's not you, it's me" (even though I was fully aware that it was indeed them and their constant gold digging) that made me want to leave. Instead, I somehow ended up virtually married for a term of no less than two years lest I want to get smacked with early termination penalties - a perilous knot making a quickie Las Vegas marriage look sane in comparison.

This cable, internet and phone service provider (who shall remain unnamed) is now all up in my business, controlling my access to television, internet, land line and now mobile phone service. Shamefully, I acknowledge being in this state by my own doing. And, what do I get out of it in return? Crappy TV content, sporadically reliable internet, phone service that doesn't like to play nice in certain corners of my house and a hole in my wallet. Sally Tomato had a better arrangement with Holly Golightly than I've got with my ISP - and he was in prison!

But, I've got a plan to change all of this. I really do. At least I think I do. Eventually. Maybe.