Stabbing a copy of The Art Of The Deal with a Basilisk’s tooth is the next step to eliminating Donald Trump, according to experts this morning.

Donald Trump howled in agony and demanded a flask of serpent’s milk to help him recover some strength after the destruction of his first Horcrux on Hollywood’s Walk of Fame yesterday.

Trump, whose unusually-styled hair is believed to hide a face on the back of his head, is understood to have concealed fragments of his soul in multiple receptacles in an attempt to protect himself from defeat in the forthcoming election.

Fragments are believed to be hidden in places as diverse as the fabric of Trump Tower, a pussy he grabbed without warning in 2003, and Mike Pence’s unnaturally shining white head of hair.



...http://newsthump.com/2016/10/27/destruction-of-walk-of-fame-star-leaves-donald-trump-down-to-his-last-six-horcruxes/