The DU Lounge

Last edited Sat Feb 28, 2026, 08:32 AM - Edit history (1)

I was offended. You are not.

What's wrong with that? You don't have a responsibility to "teach me" anything, and yet I feel like you think you do. I'm almost the same age as you, and I've lost two siblings to cancer and have a third one battling it now. Most of us have trials in life. I'm truly sorry to hear about your son's diagnosis. Cancer is, without a debt, devastating, and I wish it on no one.

Cultural differences are unique. That's why we have business decorum. In a business setting, it is not appropriate to call someone a nickname of sorts and expect that it might not offend. You have entirely missed the point that the woman was not calling the male some type of cultural nickname. To me, that means inequality. That's a big issue for me. Nonnegotiable. It doesn't bother you? No problem. But it bothers me. Your telling me that it shouldn't bother me means nothing. It bothers me. I am entitled to my feelings.

In addition, in my own culture, the word "momma" is an informal name for "mother". I reserve the use of that word for those that I've given birth to. To be called that by someone other than who I have given birth to generally equates to being called a "mother fucker". (Sorry if this is indelicate, but I didn't seem to get the point across any other way).

When transacting business, professionalism is the best approach. It's not for me to "understand" everyone's motivations and then change who *I* am to make them feel comfortable. I didn't report her to her manager. I didn't yell at her. I didn't do anything other than make a statement that was meant to make HER think about what she was doing.

There is no argument that someone should use "please" and "thank you" in business, is there? So there should be no argument that someone should use "sir" or "ma'am" OR in the alternative, ask how the customer would like to be addressed. So go ahead and deem yourself somehow superior by having a bigger acceptance umbrella if that makes you happy (i.e., "one of those willing to give a fellow human being the benefit of kindness and understanding.&quot . But just remember that other people are entitled to their opinions, too. And it's not your job to try to change them when they obviously aren't looking to have those opinions changed. Best of luck to you.