Men's Group

Warren DeMontague

(80,708 posts)

27. How is it I don't get it, when I explicitly said I do?

Mon Oct 1, 2012, 05:03 PM

Oct 2012

What I don't get is shaming this guy endlessly for what was a clumsy and rejected (yet by all accounts friendly and brief) proposal. What I don't get is holding this up as an example of "Rape Culture" when what it really is is an example of a sad guy who made the mistake of asking the wrong woman for coffee at the wrong time.

Did he make her uncomfortable? Probably. Did that mean he was sending all kinds of nasty rapey rapey nastiness at her? No. He asked he if she wanted him to join her for coffee. The mentality that turns that into a federal incident, I think, is the "problematic" one.

Conversely, I think the "attitude" in this group that some find "problematic" is the refusal to roll over and nod seriously at every single piece of questionable bullshit that comes down the pike in the name of "examples of misogyny". That's the "problem", the number one "problem" some people have with this group. Is that we don't just shut up and acquiesce, even when the assertions are flat-out fucking ludicrous.

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Imagine you're in a mirror world and... [View all] Bonobo Oct 2012 OP

Whaddaya mean "Mirror" world? That's my life, man! Warren DeMontague Oct 2012 #1

You must suck at "conversing with cops". Warren Stupidity Oct 2012 #3

From the guy who thinks men not flirt women they have not been formally introduced to. Bonobo Oct 2012 #7

Good point 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #11

very true. Warren Stupidity Oct 2012 #16

I thought it was the "hobgoblin of small minds" Warren DeMontague Oct 2012 #18

I'd suggest saltpeter instead, but its a myth. Warren Stupidity Oct 2012 #15

If we are talking about the same discussion, i think your memory is faulty. Warren DeMontague Oct 2012 #19

Yep... opiate69 Oct 2012 #21

it went way past that example but lets re-examine flirtation with strangers Warren Stupidity Oct 2012 #24

4am in an elevator can be vastly different environments. opiate69 Oct 2012 #26

I was in Vegas recently 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #30

Exactly. opiate69 Oct 2012 #33

How is it I don't get it, when I explicitly said I do? Warren DeMontague Oct 2012 #27

You said it wasn't flirtation 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #29

Also, an elevator is not a parking garage. Warren DeMontague Oct 2012 #31

Yeah he keeps changing the story 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #32

I'm curious as to your definition of flirting 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #22

On the other hand, I have never gotten "just a warning". MadrasT Oct 2012 #8

Well, I meant it when I said I'm a good driver, and careful. So it's been years since I've even been Warren DeMontague Oct 2012 #14

Imagine a world where being born male white and straight gave Warren Stupidity Oct 2012 #2

No, ummm, that's the regular world. What's your point, Warren? Bonobo Oct 2012 #4

I think the point is obvious. Warren Stupidity Oct 2012 #5

Okay, nice job. Bonobo Oct 2012 #6

D Minus? ElboRuum Oct 2012 #35

Check your privilege! 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #12

and there it is. Warren Stupidity Oct 2012 #17

Do you disagree with any specific point 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #20

So you think you would be better off as a black lesbian woman? Warren Stupidity Oct 2012 #25

I would say that if you're comparing men to women 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #28

Given the choice between that and being a gay black man, I'd choose the former. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2012 #34

Attractive people of both sexes have it easier. rrneck Oct 2012 #9

Of course I would. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2012 #10

No, on a societal level, it certainly is not a privilege. However, on an individual level Bonobo Oct 2012 #36

It's human nature to use any advantage available 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #13

That's the nature of currying favor, isn't it? noamnety Oct 2012 #23

So you're saying... MadrasT Oct 2012 #37

It's simply a variation of doing a favor for someone because they are nice ProudToBeBlueInRhody Oct 2012 #38

Doesn't do a damn thing for me. Behind the Aegis Oct 2012 #39

Are you saying women don't wear tight clothing or brush their body parts up against men 4th law of robotics Oct 2012 #40

I'd say yes on all points. Including the bleak implications of that observation. lumberjack_jeff Oct 2012 #41