Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News Editorials & Other Articles General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

Mental Health Support

no_hypocrisy

(49,835 posts) Sun Jun 19, 2022, 05:40 PM Jun 2022

It's Father's Day. My father is dead and I don't miss him at all. [View all]

He was cruel to me almost as a quest. He tried to break me through punishment, criticism, manipulation of my relationship with my siblings, minimalizing my graduations (3), and trying to hold us out as a happy, perfect family.

I'm not happy that he's dead. I'm just relieved to be free of all that emotional tumult and future threats.

36 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

It's Father's Day. My father is dead and I don't miss him at all. [View all] no_hypocrisy Jun 2022 OP

I am sorry about your treatment by your father at140 Jun 2022 #1

My mother was hateful to me in a similar way. I am quite sure it was not a misguided love. Scrivener7 Jun 2022 #2

You know what hurt me? no_hypocrisy Jun 2022 #6

Find it in your heart to forgive and love your parents at140 Jun 2022 #12

Your father was reluctant. no_hypocrisy Jun 2022 #15

I am so sorry this was done to you. Scrivener7 Jun 2022 #21

Yes, there is a difference at140 Jun 2022 #25

This is insensitive. No-hypocrisy has described an abusive situation, one which was surely Scrivener7 Jun 2022 #20

If everything is true, yes at140 Jun 2022 #26

So you minimize the teller's experience and now suggest that he or she is Scrivener7 Jun 2022 #28

hahaha in every court room there are always 2 sides at140 Jun 2022 #31

This is not a courtroom. You are not a judge or jury. No one has asked you to make a judgement. Scrivener7 Jun 2022 #32

Wrong! I made NO judgement. I never said poster is lying. at140 Jun 2022 #33

Obviously, you do. Scrivener7 Jun 2022 #34

good bye... at140 Jun 2022 #35

Bye now! Be careful about those judgements! Scrivener7 Jun 2022 #36

I know what you mean. At one time, my father decided that saying "I love you" would somehow ... eppur_se_muova Jun 2022 #24

I understand that completely. MuseRider Jun 2022 #3

So sad and awful that you had that experience whathehell Jun 2022 #11

This message was self-deleted by its author MuseRider Jun 2022 #4

I feel the same. My mothers ex biologic partner was not a good man. He left pain & chaos behind irisblue Jun 2022 #5

As to your last statement, AMEN! no_hypocrisy Jun 2022 #7

You have my support, brother. Cartoonist Jun 2022 #8

So sorry you had a crummy Dad. kimbutgar Jun 2022 #9

I feel the same The Blue Flower Jun 2022 #10

There was a time I wanted my father dead. BWdem4life Jun 2022 #13

Thanks for being honest. enough Jun 2022 #14

Sorry and glad to hear at the same time. InAbLuEsTaTe Jun 2022 #16

I know how you feel ReluctanceTango Jun 2022 #17

What a miserable waste of life. Glad you are rid of his physical presence. MLAA Jun 2022 #18

Good for you. You don't know owe cruelty anything. Especially cruelty against a child. MLAA Jun 2022 #19

I am glad you are free. In my case, it was my mother. LoisB Jun 2022 #22

I can sympathize. My dad was not as cruel as all that, but he just didn't like people at all ... eppur_se_muova Jun 2022 #23

Same here but Duppers Jun 2022 #27

Foot Note: no_hypocrisy Jun 2022 #29

What I have found since my mother's death is that, with distance, Scrivener7 Jun 2022 #30