Mental Health Support

You know what? I can tell just from your posts here that I would like you if I knew you in person. You come across as a nice guy and I think what you did for your parents all of those years might qualify you for sainthood.

You need to work through all that you've said here. If you choose to do it with a therapist, that's fine. That's the route most people take when they are dealing with long standing issues. And I bet these issues with your family go back into your childhood and not just to your early 20s.

But just getting all of this stuff out of you, and having someone witness what you have been through internally, is good I think. You are off to a great start in resolving your issues in my opinion. Keep going.

I'll tell you a little story. I had a rough childhood- physical, emotional, and sexual abuse; all of them at some point and over a long period of time. But for some reason, in my adulthood, I glossed over all of that stuff and actually used to tell people that I had a happy childhood.

I am a trucker, and one night I was out in the middle of the Utah desert and I had just shut down for the evening. For the previous two days I had been really angry. For some reason, all of the bad shit that happened to me when I was a kid came to the surface of my consciousness and I was so angry at my family. I came into this forum here and just let it all out. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED TO ME. IT WAS PAINFUL AND HUMILIATING. IT FUCKED MY HEAD UP FOR LIFE.

I went through a lot of incidences that happened back then. Talk about airing dirty laundry. But you know what? Once I got all of that stuff out of my head and I had someone, the people in this forum, to witness it and be on my side...it was the start of my healing.

I'm not saying that you should go into any more detail than you have. But what you have said is the way you really feel and it is out of your head where you can see it really good now. And we will be on your side. We are your witnesses.

I continued to be angry toward my family for a couple of months after I spilled my guts here, but the anger slowly dissipated. After I had worked through my emotions I saw what I needed to do. I just needed to create some space for myself. And when I did, I found someone who truly loved me for who I am. We're married now.

One foot in front of the other, man. It's just one foot in front of the other.