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Bereavement

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Uben

(7,719 posts)
Wed Jan 21, 2015, 09:39 PM Jan 2015

Another loss [View all]

I lost my mom on Friday and we buried her Monday. Had to pretty much do everything on Saturday so it has been hectic, to say the least. There wasn't time to get the obit in the paper, so the family teamed up and made lots of calls to friends and relatives. I'm sure we missed some, but whatcha gonna do? Had a great turn-out for the funeral and a beautiful service which was a great tribute to a wonderful woman.
After losing my wife three years ago (wow, it's been that long!) and now suffering the loss of mom, I feel as if there is a great void in my life. I've come to terms with loss and know the only way forward is to just keep plugging away. It hurts, but it's reality and I can deal with it.
I am now dealing with getting my step-dad into an assisted living facility. I knew when one passed I'd have to find a place for the other. Together, they were able to remain at home with my assistance, but neither were capable of staying at home alone.

I found a very helpful bit of information if any of you have a parent who is a veteran. The VA will help qualifying vets with assisted living costs. My step-dad served in the Korean war and will be getting about $1700/mo for what I think they call "aid and attendance" that will help knock the sting off the costly expense of assisted living. That's a big chunk of help! I contacted the local VA office and picked up the paperwork today. Just needed his DD 214 (discharge papers), a TB test, and a couple of pages to be filled out by his physician specifying his medical needs. Without this help I don't think he could swing assisted living, but now it's totally doable!

edit:If you don't have or can't find the DD 214 papers, they can be attained from the Nation Archives. My step-dad's was lost in a fire sometime ago in St. Louis before they moved them to the National Archives. They discovered this when he applied for Social Security in 1992 but found sufficient evidence to show he served from 1952 to 1954 and issued him replacement papers.

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