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History of Feminism
In reply to the discussion: The plight of the bitter nerd: Why so many awkward, shy guys end up hating feminism (Salon) [View all]YoungDemCA
(5,714 posts)2. Check out Laurie Penny's article on "Nerd Entitlement"
Hi there, shy, nerdy boys. Your suffering was and is real. I really fucking hope that it got better, or at least is getting better, At the same time, I want you to understand that that very real suffering does not cancel out male privilege, or make it somehow alright.n Privilege doesn't mean you don't suffer, which, I know, totally blows.
Women generally don't get to think of men as less than human, not because we're inherently better people, not because our magical feminine energy makes us more empathetic, but because patriarchy doesn't let us. We're really not allowed to just not consider men's feelings, or to suppose for an instant that a man's main or only relevance to us might be his prospects as a sexual partner. That's just not the way this culture expects us to think about men. Men get to be whole people at all times. Women get to be objects, or symbols, or alluring aliens whose responses you have to game to "get" what you want.
This is why Silicon Valley Sexism. This is why Pick Up Artists. This is why Rape Culture.
Scott, imagine what it's like to have all the problems you had and then putting up with structural misogyny on top of that. Or how about a triple whammy: you have to go through your entire school years again but this time you're a lonely nerd who also faces sexism and racism. This is why Silicon Valley is fucked up. Because it's built and run by some of the most privileged people in the world who are convinced that they are among the least. People whose received trauma makes them disinclined to listen to pleas from people whose trauma was compounded by structural oppression. People who don't want to hear that there is anyone more oppressed than them, who definitely don't want to hear that maybe women and people of colour had to go through the hell of nerd puberty as well, because they haven't recovered from their own appalling nerdolescence. People who definitely dont want to hear that, smart as they are, there might be basic things about society that they havent understood, because they have been prevented from understanding by the very forces that caused them such pain as children.
Women generally don't get to think of men as less than human, not because we're inherently better people, not because our magical feminine energy makes us more empathetic, but because patriarchy doesn't let us. We're really not allowed to just not consider men's feelings, or to suppose for an instant that a man's main or only relevance to us might be his prospects as a sexual partner. That's just not the way this culture expects us to think about men. Men get to be whole people at all times. Women get to be objects, or symbols, or alluring aliens whose responses you have to game to "get" what you want.
This is why Silicon Valley Sexism. This is why Pick Up Artists. This is why Rape Culture.
Scott, imagine what it's like to have all the problems you had and then putting up with structural misogyny on top of that. Or how about a triple whammy: you have to go through your entire school years again but this time you're a lonely nerd who also faces sexism and racism. This is why Silicon Valley is fucked up. Because it's built and run by some of the most privileged people in the world who are convinced that they are among the least. People whose received trauma makes them disinclined to listen to pleas from people whose trauma was compounded by structural oppression. People who don't want to hear that there is anyone more oppressed than them, who definitely don't want to hear that maybe women and people of colour had to go through the hell of nerd puberty as well, because they haven't recovered from their own appalling nerdolescence. People who definitely dont want to hear that, smart as they are, there might be basic things about society that they havent understood, because they have been prevented from understanding by the very forces that caused them such pain as children.
http://www.newstatesman.com/laurie-penny/on-nerd-entitlement-rebel-alliance-empire
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The plight of the bitter nerd: Why so many awkward, shy guys end up hating feminism (Salon) [View all]
YoungDemCA
Jan 2015
OP
Long-term loneliness and lack of relationships is plenty painful for lots of people, myself included
nomorenomore08
Jan 2015
#33
Is it terribly wrong for me to want to just 'slap him upside his head' so he can have both?
freshwest
Jan 2015
#3
I don't think any of these nerds feel privileged or dominant. They envy the so-called ...
dawg
Jan 2015
#16
here is the thing. it is about privilege while they see it or not. it a "i deserve" as you state.
seabeyond
Jan 2015
#17
It *is* about privilege. But these guys aren't privileged when it comes to relationships.
dawg
Jan 2015
#18
It has nothing to do with being awkward or shy, imo. Plenty of likable, outgoing men are also raging
chrisa
Jan 2015
#19
I was an awkward shy guy when I was younger, but I never was a bitter person.
MineralMan
Jan 2015
#20
why should a man insist on impressing many women with his physical/mental prowess? instead
Tuesday Afternoon
Jan 2015
#21
It's about not being macho. And they are considered abnormal in the larger society.
Manifestor_of_Light
Jan 2015
#22
yes, I understand .... actually I was speaking to the macho type male and their mindset
Tuesday Afternoon
Jan 2015
#23
exactly. in these conversations, it is huge concern they cannot attract the "hot" woman. as if owed
seabeyond
Jan 2015
#25
I really liked that article. I particularly think the distinction between what happens in reality
el_bryanto
Jan 2015
#26
and get over the myth there is only adventure and provider. many women self provide.
seabeyond
Jan 2015
#28
"I think the awkward guys blaming feminism are blaming the wrong thing."
nomorenomore08
Jan 2015
#34
Reading these kinds of articles, I always find myself thinking, "It could have been me."
nomorenomore08
Jan 2015
#35