Interfaith Group

Dear TM99,

From one who has lost both parents but gained a different sense of family and heredity, some words of dubious wisdom. May your parents thrive for years to come. But whatever the outcome, this is one of those moments in life where the superficial aspects appear in proper perspective, and the deep and cosmic issues of what connects you to all life are highlighted.

When my dad died, I was in my early 40s, and almost instantly recognized I was destined to write about the history of his family. When my mother died, I was in my early 50s, and well along on the paternal family history. Both of those transitions stand out as points in time where the things that were really important in life were highlighted and more transitory issues were seen in context as not so important.

Most of us, I think, spend our 20s and 30s trying to fulfill some unique individual purpose. But in our 40s and 50s we discover how much the really deep existential issues of our existence are deeply embedded in generations of history.

At least, that is my experience as the son of a father who also exemplified the transitions of the 1960s re interracial marriage.

Blessings to you as you face these life issues.

CYD