General Discussion

At first, you're terrified, and then, gradually, you realize that they are going to be just fine.

My first experience with that was when I left my younger daughter at her new school literally half-way around the world from us. She was all of 16. Twelve time zones away. We said good-bye, and I drove off in my rented car back to the hotel, as my flights home didn't start until the next morning. As I was leaving, I looked in my rear view mirror and saw in the distance the extinct volcano where her school was, 2000 feet up the side. I thought to myself, what the HELL are you doing? You are leaving her something like 8000 miles from home in a country where they speak her second language (English), but not her first language.

But she adapted, fit right in, and by the time the first semester was over, she was so confident and at ease that she had lost her accent when speaking English, and had even unconsciously learned a fair amount of the local indigenous language without even trying. Her new circle of friends was as important to her as her old one back home, and those friendships have lasted until today, more than 20 years later.

It dawned upon me that if they are mature enough to have the self-confidence to do this, maybe we as parents are more in need of reassurance than they are.